Restarting life in this wonderful world with a goddess!
by StarKnight07
Summary: My name is Kouta. Minazaki Kouta. At the age of 19, I say goodbye to Earth as my life reached its end. But! As every cliché types of stories out there, I met a Goddess that gave me a chance to live once again. This marks the start of my second life, not as a NEET, but as a legendary hero! ...I hope. (OC story) (Decided to change the title because it sounds weird as heck)
1. Chapter 1

My name is Kouta. Minazaki Kouta to be exact.

I see, I see… you're thinking I'm that Kouta who is a fruit Jesus? Too bad! A God doesn't have any rights to even stand against me! For I am a…

' _Louder! You're my everything~~ Kagayaki afure rete yuku anata no oto wa, watashi no oto de Try to… Tsutateai no!'_

Shut in NEET (still in training).

If you're wondering what I'm listening to right now, it is a song by a popular girl band called buds of roses.

Anyway.

My name is Minazaki Kouta, age 19 and got kicked out from my own business three days ago. So now I'm practically jobless, with a limited money in my bank account.

My family isn't in a great state right now, I mean my old man and my mom got divorced months ago, and neither of them would bring me. I'm pretty much abandoned. Great, right?

So now here I am, currently sitting alone in my bedroom while listening to Japanese music from my computer.

At least my failure of a parent gave me thirty million yen, that's a thing. But just like what I said earlier, I don't have that much money in my bank account. My own money, mind you.

"Ah shit, I ran out of cup noodles and also beer. Time to go to a convenient store."

I wore my red jacket as I quickly left my house.

"OH JESUS, THE SUN IS BRIGHT AS ALL HELLS TODAY!" What is wrong with you, you asshole of a ball?! You wanna fight or something?!

"Note to self: buy sunglasses sometimes."

The store is not that far from my house though, that's a plus.

As I walk under the scorching sun, I quickly realize how my appearance differs a lot with others around me. They all look happy and… full of themselves? I don't know I'm probably just salty because I lost my job.

I put on my hoodie and looked down in order to not make useless eye contacts with other people. Wow talk about being an edgelord.

* * *

"Thanks for your visit!"

I sighed as I walked out of the store. Sorry about the sudden time-skip, I don't like explaining my way to the store.

I look inside the plastic bag on my hand. Six cups of instant noodles and ten cans of beer. That'll do for the rest of the week.

"Now, time to safely go back to my safe haven which is my house without getting into any danger. Nope, definitely not going to trigger any flags this way!"

I walked with a confident pace, even the scorching asshole up there won't stop me!

That's right! It's not like I have any bounty for my head or anything! Everything is gonna be okay!

*SCREECH!*

As I hear the voice of wheels screeching furiously against the street, I look at my right and-

"Oh motherfuck-!"

*CRASH!*

The only thing I could see or hear is the people's screams, and my flying plastic bag that spills out my cup noodles and beer cans.

.

.

.

.

.

As I open my eyes, I could immediately notice that I'm sitting alone in this weird, hollow white space. Oh, great, I lost my job and I'm fucking dead. Can this day be any worse?

Also, I noticed a far more superior chair, or a throne I should say, in front of me with no one sitting on it. What a shame, I feel like the throne would make me feel better…

"Ahem. It appears I am late. I am very sorry."

"What?! Who said that?! Mind you I learned karate and broke my bones four times during my days!"

Out of nowhere, a girl with long silvery hair and blue eyes appeared. She wears a white _hagoromo_ that is noticeably loose.

Okay, I changed my mind.

This day probably will go for the better!

"W-why are you staring at me like that?"

I quickly realized that I stared at her beautiful looks like some random pervert and coughed in embarrassment.

"I'm sorry, please don't call the cops."

The girl laughed as I sweat bullets. Oh, am I comedian now?

"You are really funny. I wouldn't try to arrest you or anything. You are dead after all."

I'm… dead?

"Wait, I'm really dead? As in, not in the living world anymore? Then is this heaven?"

The girl scratched her cheek, "Well… this is the second step to go to heaven, to be exact. But let's see. Your name is… Minazaki Kouta-san, am I right?"

I nodded.

"You were 19 years old when you died."

I nodded again.

"You were hit by a drunk man who drove his sedan recklessly, but you were actually killed not by the impact… b-but by your purchases, which was the beer cans…"

Wait, what?!

"H-h-hold on! Death by _beer cans_?! What kind of death is that?! Isn't that too embarrassing?!"

"W-well… there are various cases of… ridiculous deaths. Like for example, death by shock due to thinking you would die from getting hit by a truck, choking on rock candy, and death due to over grinding RPG games…"

I held my head tightly and held back my urge to scream like a dying pigeon. But I gave up.

"DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN ITTTTTTTTTTTTTT ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!"

I rolled all over the boundless, endless void as the girl sweatdropped looking at my antics.

"C-calm down, please! I-I am Eris, the Goddess of Fortune! The reason why you met me in the first place is so that I could send you to heaven!"

I stopped rolling and I look at her, tears flowing out and snot coming out my nose.

"A-are you serious?"

"Yes, I am. But just like what my Senpai says… Heaven isn't really what you humans think. There are no entertainment because heaven is supposed to be a pure place. No TV, no console games and definitely no R-18 contents either!"

….

Screw religion and their influence. I mean, I got promised to have like, I don't know 4 angels to accompany me or something.

"What kind of heaven is that?!"

"W-well, you can talk all day long with other people there while enjoying the bright sun!"

"Screw that!"

"I wanted to at least have a fun time eternally in heaven, yet all I can do there is sitting around talking with those who have come before me under the radiant sun?! Fuck that! My parents disown me, I lost my job, I lost my girlfriend _and_ I'm still a goddamned virgin when I'm dead! Aaaaaaaaaaaaa I can't stand it anymore, my life sucks!"

Well, it's just like what they say in RPG games.

Never expect anything if you're a side character.

I knew somehow or another, I was destined to be a hero. Someone who would be eventually praised by humanity because I have done something extremely spectacular.

But I guess things doesn't work out that way, huh?

"Now, now. Let's sit on each other's chairs, ok?"

I nodded and clumsily sat down on the wooden chair again.

Sigh… why must my life be this horrible?

"Kouta-san, if I were to say there's an alternate choice, would you take the offer?"

Oh? Now I'm interested.

"Let's hear it."

Eris-sama nodded before explaining.

"You see, humans like you play a lot of action games, no? Well, there is actually a world where fantasies come true, people who died can resurrect as a resident in said world. The Fantasy World, however, is a wonderful yet dangerous world. Why it's because a demon king is slowly but surely creeping out from the shadows, planning to overthrow the rules of that world!"

Wow, such cliché plot. Who made this up? I wanna punch them in their private parts.

"Are you sure you're not making this up?"

She shook her head, "No, I'm being serious. If you were to choose to be alive again in the Fantasy World, you may ask me one thing that shall help you there. It could be a spell that could overwrite damage, a holy sword that could purify anything it strikes, or even a magical tome that could become a fairy loli!"

Okay, the third example is very ridiculous.

"Say, Eris-sama."

"Eris is fine, even though I'm a Goddess, my physical body is younger than yours."

"Okay then. Eris, can I ask you something?"

"What is it?"

Oh God why is she so cute?

"The Fantasy World is nice and all… but I think I want to stay by your side."

Silence.

"EEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHHHHHHHHH?!"

Then there's the unworldly scream. Thanks a lot, Cliché gods.

"No, like, aren't you lonely here? I can imagine you sitting alone in this stupid space waiting for other dead people to come. Aren't you sad? Because I sure do."

"W-well… I have my trusty angels that helped me sometimes…"

"Sometimes? So, they leave you alone most of the time? God, to think your angels are such dicks… why would they abandon someone as cute as you?"

Oh boy, coming from a virgin like me that line would be considered as my death flag. But I'm dead so screw it. No going back.

"W-well… I appreciate your offer, but I am okay being alone, most of the time…"

Tch.

So the 'ikemen harem protagonist' style doesn't work, huh?

Wait a minute.

Eris says that she will give me anything I wanted if I do want to live again in the Fantasy World.

Oh, now I get it. It appears playing puzzle solving games does help advancing my brain…

"Okay, okay. If that's what makes you happy then I won't force my way to be by your side… So, I guess I'll go to the Fantasy World."

"Really?"

I stand up while stretching my body. It's been a while since my last workout so I hope I could live a healthier life in my soon-to-be second world.

"Yup. And also, you said that I can ask for one thing, right?"

Eris smiles and stand up as well, "Yes! Anything for the next candidate to be a great hero!"

Oho, I like the sound of that.

" _Absolutely_ anything?"

"Absolutely!"

I smirked as I held Eris' delicate hand. This is it, I knew for one thing.

The only way I can easily defeat the demon king is…

I may have been a loser when I'm alive, but now… it is different!

As the portal to the Fantasy World opened, I confidently say my next line.

"I want just one thing: I want you to accompany me in my quest to kill the demon king!"

The portal lets out a bright light that eventually eats me and Eris.

"Eh?! Wait, wait, wait! I possibly cannot do that! My job is to send people to either heaven or the Fantasy World, not to go to one of them!"

I laugh victoriously, "Fuhahahahaha! There's no going back now! You're coming with me!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

And now, as the light becoming too bright for its own good, is my turn to live once more in a Fantasy World.

I am not going to fail my life this time, I knew it.

After all, I have the Goddess of Fortune with me, what could possibly go wrong?

* * *

 **A/N: I'm starting a Konosuba fanfic because I feel like the series is just that good, haha. But as this is my second story, I won't update it soon because my first fic (from Hyperdimension Neptunia) is... not done yet, to put it simply. Soooo yeah! Sorry if the chapter is short and all. I feel like I want to make a shorter story or something. That is all from me, StarKnight07, signing out!**


	2. Chapter 2

My name is Minazaki Kouta. I was confirmed dead but was given another chance to live a second life in a Fantasy World.

But this…

"THIS IS NOT WHAT I EXPECTEDDDDD!"

What is currently going on, you may ask?

I literally is going straight towards the earth with speed that could make me deaf at any moment, and I will probably die just from landing.

Wait a minute, where's Eris?

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Eris is also falling from the sky and she's not that far from me. Wait, if she is a goddess, she can just fly or something, right?

Wait, wait, wait! That's not the question here!

"I need to grab her if not there's no point of bringing her here!" I gritted my teeth as I try to reach her.

As each second passed, the both of us is almost hitting the ground!

"Ah, Kouta-san…!"

"C-calm down, okay?! Grab my hand!"

I reached out and she grabbed my hand as tight as possible. She's a goddess, so letting her die instantly is definitely not an option.

I just need to do prevent her from hitting the ground before me.

And so, I pulled her close to my chest and due to the added weight, I fell to the fields minutes after.

"OUCH, OUCH, OUCH- Wait, it didn't hurt at all?"

Even though I made a huge noise when me and Eris hits the ground, I didn't feel any damage being dealt to me at all.

"…Eris? Hey, Eris!"

I examine her from head to toe.

She got a medium sized cut on her forehead, but other than that it seems like she's doing ok.

"For the sake of my sanity…" I grumbled as I carefully carried her and made her rest against a tree.

And even though I felt nothing is wrong with my body, I can't move properly.

But still…

"This world… it's beautiful."

The clear blue sky, the fresh breeze of the afternoon, and the medieval-styled buildings not far from here.

Yes, this is truly an alternate world based on RPG games.

I looked at the sleeping goddess, Eris, once again.

I need to tend her wounds.

"My best bet is that you took the damage from me using some convenient skills, right? Well, I have convenient things as well…"

I did explain that I was taking part of some business, and it was related to medical fields.

I was planning to be a doctor but whatever.

I took some items from my jacket's pocket, namely band-aids, gauze bandages and antiseptics.

It doesn't look like that deep of an injury, so these will do for now.

Carefully, I apply the antiseptics with the help of a sterile cotton on her wound.

Am I tired, carrying all these things? Obviously yes, but even though I became a NEET for three days doesn't mean I changed completely.

After applying the antiseptics, I wrapped up her forehead carefully with my bandage.

"…There's some cuts on her fingers, as well…" Thank goodness I have band-aids as well.

"There. All done." I'm glad I brought first-aid items. It's gonna be a pain in the ass not having these things.

I sighed in relief as I sit near the still unconscious Eris. And I thought goddesses cannot gain injuries.

"She does look like your typical younger step-sister in a visual novel."

Seeing her sleeping with this peaceful aura coming from her makes me somewhat guilty of dragging her into this world.

But it is for the greater good anyways.

I seemed to be traced by her peacefulness. She really is a goddess….

"Why are you staring at like that?"

"Gah!"

When I came back to reality, Eris has already woken up.

I coughed up in embarrassment, "S-so? Are you feeling better?"

"E-eh? Y-yes, I feel slightly better now. But… I might be less useful for the next five days or so…"

Hearing her saying that makes me confused.

"What do you mean?"

She looked away from me as tears started to formed, "I-I'm just a goddess of fortune, so I don't have any kinds of attack spells… and since I'm trapped here until we defeated the Demon King, my powers became weak…"

Oh god this is worse than I expected.

To think that my plan backfired _this_ bad…

"I-it's okay, I'll find a way. Even if you're weak, you're still a goddess. And because fortune is your ace, I believe we can escape any predicaments easily."

First step in taking care of a weak goddess loli; cheer her up. Not really, I just want to make her feel less bad.

"Okay, no problem! For now, let's go to that town. What's the town's name again?"

Hearing my question, Eris thought for a moment.

"I think it's called Axel town. It is the town for novice adventurers and those who got reincarnated will be placed here."

I see. This is definitely a world based on RPG games.

"Hmm… it's best to search for a place to gather information. And with that comes another problem…"

I look at Eris once again.

"Say, Eris."

"Yes?"

"You do have followers, right?"

She nodded and says, "Yes, is there any problem?" with a casual tone.

My gawd, to think I would explain something so obvious…

"When we stepped on the town, people will definitely notice you! They'll be like 'Wait, is that Eris-sama?' and they'll act violent to me while saying 'Hey, you fiend! How dare you walk alongside Eris-sama! Did you hurt her?! We'll make you pay, bastard!' or something among those lines!"

She seems to understand, "I see! It is going to be a problem, doesn't it…"

"So, don't wear that headpiece, and take off those breast pads."

"B-breast pads?!"

I sighed as she covers her chest area, blushing heavily.

"Before I became a NEET in training, I was a medical student. And aside from extreme growth, big bust size on a small body could be tumor, and judging from you… seriously, at least choose convincing pads and not the saggy ones."

"T-t-tumor?!"

Actually, I wasn't in that kind of medical field. I'm aiming to be a veterinarian, not doctors specialized in human body.

"If you remove those pads away, I assure you no one will suspect you as the actual goddess of fortune, okay? It will help us a lot."

"O-okay… b-but please don't tell my followers…"

God her hopeful eyes. I'm feeling guiltier now.

"Yeah, yeah. I don't think I'd get away easily if I spoil the truth. Gonna look away now so you better take those pads off."

I turned my back on her and closed my eyes for extra measures. Also, I told her to tap on my shoulder if she's done.

I felt a tap on my shoulder.

"Okay, let's move."

As the both of us stands up, she struggles to do so.

"A-ah, Kouta-san…"

"…Can't be helped. It is my fault anyways. Hop on, I'll carry you."

And so, I carried her on my back as the two us sets our destination to the town of novice adventurers.

* * *

The town of beginners, Axel Town.

Yes, truly a place that suits my aesthetics. The medieval-styled buildings, the normal lives of totally ordinary people.

This is looking better compared to Japan now.

"….Say, Eris-sama?"

"Yes, Kouta-san?"

"Sorry to break the ice, but why is everyone staring at us?"

I changed my mind.

I guess I screwed up picking the goddess on my back as my 'cheat'.

Well I guess there is a good reason people are giving me weird looks.

"…Hey you."

I gulped as one of the crowd walked up to me.

"Y-yes?"

"That girl you're carrying…"

Oh god please don't make this the end of my alternate life!

"Is she a die-hard fan of Eris-sama?! She looks so cute!"

Eh?

The crowd immediately smiles looking at Eris who changed her expression from scared to relieved.

What is wrong with this town?

"Y-yeah! She's my younger step sister, and she loves Eris-sama so much she cosplayed as her!"

"I see, I see! As a man who worships Eris-sama, I totally approve your idea little girl! Right, guys?!"

They all cheered as the _actual_ Eris got a sudden raise of her temperature due to embarrassment.

"Hey, can one of you tell me where's the guild of this town? Thing is, we kind of need some job because we're… uh… *sniff* we're homeless, a-and… *sniff* oh God I'm actually crying!"

Of course, they are nothing but fake tears. I am somewhat of a scammer in my previous life, so I took my experience to test them for starters.

"H-hey, no need to cry! I see, you two want to be an adventurer! Then, go straight to the center of this town, the Guild is very hard not to miss! And I guess you lot don't have the fee to pay for the registration, so here."

The dangerous-looking but kind-hearted man gave me a sack of coins.

"T-this is?"

"A blessing from Eris-sama herself! Those Eris will at least make you two live in a stable condition for a while."

Holy crap, is this the effect from pulling the goddess of fortune with me?

"T-thank you, kind sir! I-I can't express my deepest gratitude as I'm currently unable to move too much… but thank you, thank you, thank you so much!" Eris says as her tears leaked out again, with an angelic smile capable to defeat all kinds of demonic beasts imaginable.

"You're very welcome! Now, go forth, weird-looking man with his cute step younger sister!"

The crowd that were giving me weird looks now cheered and clapped their hands as I walk, still carrying Eris in a piggyback position.

"K-K-Kouta-san…"

"Yes, Eris-sama?"

"M-My followers doesn't recognize me as the actual me…"

"They sure didn't, eh?"

"I-I-Is it because I don't wear my b-b-breast pads?"

"Nope, pretty sure they are tricked by your out of character-ness."

* * *

After taking a walk for 15 minutes or so, we have finally reached the Adventurer's Guild. The building is so cool!

"Eris, can you walk by yourself now?"

"…Yes I thing I can."

I crouched down a little so that Eris could hop off with ease.

"Anyway, Eris. I think you should use a proxy name?"

"Proxy? Like, fake names?"

I nodded, "I've seen many scenarios like this in RPG games. The main heroine is in a huge pinch so she must hide her identity under a fake name!"

Why are you looking at me with such amazed expression?

"I see! Then, what name should I use? I-I'm bad at making up names…"

I immediately snapped my fingers and smiled, "Chris. Sounds good, right? Gives off a holy being-like aura to it, fitting for you don't you think?"

She smiled widely once again and nodded her head, "Yeah! I like the name! A-ah, that w-was immature of me… as a goddess, I should hold back my private feelings…"

Not being honest, eh? Can't be helped.

"Well, let's go!"

As I open the main entrance of the guild, all I could say is…

This place is seriously chaotic. The embodiment of chaotic beings themselves.

Adventurers alike are drinking and eating as if they got hit by the ice age six times in a row, both drunk and sober, they are all very disturbingly loud. And who drinks in broad daylight?!

"Welcome! If you two wished to look for a job, please go to the counters. If you are looking for a fine meal, sit in any vacant seats available!" is what a waitress with beautiful, short red hair said to me while winking her eye.

Those assets though.

Anyway.

"It's over there, huh…."

Suddenly, Eris -or should I say Chris- tugged my arm.

"Just now, you were thinking of something lewd about that waitress with medium-sized breasts, am I mistaken, Kouta-san?"

"No, I did not. I am not the kind of pervert that brainwashes every girl he sees, so rest assured."

Thankfully, Chris seems to trust me enough. And so, the two of us walked to one of the counters. Obviously, I picked the one with the most well-developed- I mean the one with the most dependable ones by appearance.

God those melons are definitely not made for humans.

"Welcome to the guild! Are you two here want to register as adventurers?"

I nodded, "Yes. We came from a… distant place from here so please explain how the registration works."

"Certainly!"

*Boing!*

Okay, those abominations are definitely dangerous.

"Kouta-san…. I don't know why but I'm a little bit offended by how you look at those… those… things…"

The counter lady coughed to catch our attention.

"Before registration, there is of course a registration fee. When you have finished your registration, you will get this adventurer's card," She showed me and Chris what appears to be a card for adventurers, its size is almost the same as one of those trading card game sizes.

"this card is very important, as it tells you your stats, basic information, and is the way to acquire new Skills."

Skills?

"Skills vary from the most basic ones to the most advanced ones, of course you will need a Skill Point in order to learn Skills. Every living beings here has a special kind of soul that could be obtained when you eat those things or defeat them, called Experience Points. Use that to level up and unlock new Class! And before I forgot to mention, every quest-related information will be shown here. From how many enemies you have defeated and your Level progress."

….Curse you, RMK.

"With all of that out of the way, do you have the registration fee required?"

I took out the sack of coins from earlier.

"Would this be enough for the two of us?" I asked as I gave the lady four gold coins.

"Certainly! Now please, touch the top of this magical device with your palm. This device will scan the statistics of your body and mental health, to pick out the best Class for you to start with." said the lady as she takes out a magical(?) device that has a blue orb on top of it. Also, there is a black adventurer card under it, probably the orb will carve the data on the card.

Not gonna lie, the device looks like the one from Globe Master.

"I just need to touch and hold it, I assume?"

The lady nodded.

Well, here goes nothing. My first step to become an adventurer!

As I touched the blue orb, it began to emits a single ray of light that carves letters on the blank card.

"Thank you very much! Okay, let's see… Minazuki Kouta-san. Your strength is less than average, health is normal, your magic capacity and luck is very low but the good thing is your dexterity and agility are near perfect! With this, you could use some Classes that uses agility the most, Archer and Thief for example. Archers are handy due to their farsight skill and snipe skill, combine them together and you will wipe monsters from afar! Meanwhile, Thief is excellent when you want to explore dungeons, and with Steal, you can win through dirty means…"

Oi, that last part is not necessary at all!

"I guess I'll be a Thief for now. Gonna go with the dirtiest Class first."

"Very well, but please remember that Steal is very luck-based so there is a huge chance of failing when you used it."

As I receive my adventurer card, I began to read the weird character this world's language used. I understand it though, probably a side effect of the rebirth?

As I keep on focusing on my card, Chris just made the counter lady gasped in shock.

"These stats are-! Maxed out dexterity, agility, magic capacity and luck! Even with low strength and average health, you are capable of accessing every advanced Classes!"

Hold on, didn't she told me she has been weakened?! That's bullshit!

Chris looked at me with a wide smile and put up a peace sign.

"I want to be an Archpriest, please." Archpriest?! That's like the Row IV class from that grinding hell game!

"Archpriest is a powerful class, able to use every magic there is, an all-rounder class that will make every quest feels like a breeze! Chris-san, we'll be on your care!" Wait, why are you bowing deeply to her?!

The entire guild cheered as Chris sheepishly laughs while saying "It's nothing, really."

And thus, the first step of becoming adventurers has been completed.

* * *

"Hey, Chris."

"Yes?"

"I know you're the embodiment of luck and fortune, but isn't this a bit too much?"

Let me explain.

In this town full of novice adventurers, expert jobs and classes such as Archpriest is considered rare here, and Chris, being a goddess herself, is easily able to use the Archpriest class. As such, we were given free lunch from the pub.

Seriously, is this even allowed?

"Even if we refused, they're a little…"

"Yeah, they're a bunch of idiots."

In front of us is a huge plate of what seems to be grilled pork and vegetables, garlic bread and a huge glass of beer for me and a cup of tea for Chris.

They also stated that even alcoholic drinks are allowed for people age 14 and above, as long as they are able to pay for whatever problems they will make when they're drunk.

"Anyway, I guess we can say we're safe from buying food for today, I mean this is way more than we imagined."

"Ah, Kouta-san?"

"Yes, I'm Kouta."

"The counter lady says that everything that we defeat or consumes has Experience Points, right? Then if I do this… [Blessing]!"

The foods in front of us started to glow in a radiant gold aura.

"W-w-wait a minute! Did you just casted a Buffing spell?!"

Munching a vegetable, she looked at me and explained: "It is better if we Level Up a few levels before we start our quest, right?"

"It's better to swallow before talking, Chris-sama."

"Ah, sorry. *Gulp!* What I'm thinking is that, if food gives us even a tiny amount of Experience Points, we can slowly level up just from eating!"

Crap, this girl is way creative than me.

"Maybe you're right. Well Itadakimasu."

Translator's note: Itadakimasu means thank you for the food.

The two of us ate in silence despite the guild is still noisy as a school attacked by students who brings assault rifles.

"Still this meat is really good."

Chris nodded, "Yes. To think grilled frog meat tastes like this, I thought the taste is going to be weird."

Wait a second.

Grilled _frog meat_.

I gagged due to my instinct telling me to puke everything out, but I close my mouth with my hands.

"Kouta-san?"

"I-I'm feeling weird all of a sudden. I guess I need to steel myself for what's next to come…"

Mom, dad… please give me emotional support from Japan. I really need it.

The afternoon goes on as we finished our lunch. Well, I gave up halfway through because eating grilled frog meat felt weird. But the drink is nice though, I'll give them that.

I actually went on to talk with the other adventurers about any tips or guides, and let's just say I've made some new friends thanks to a certain loli. And without me and Chris noticing, the sun is setting.

Now comes the next question: where should we rest for the end of the day?

The man from before told me the sack of coins will provide me and Chris at least a week, but if we do want to rest in an inn, we should be more careful about our expenses.

We have limited money to use, so taking on quests seems to be a good way to start, but…

As if she knew I was thinking about this problem, Chris asks: "How much money do we have, Kouta-san?"

"Let's see…" I open the sack of coins.

Somehow, I knew how much the coins amount to without learning.

"….195.000 Eris, I believe we used 5.000 Eris as the registration fee. If the cost to stay one night at an inn is 50.000 Eris, we can at least rent two rooms because sleeping together would be awkward for the two of us. I guess we can live without any problems for now. Do you want to do something before we end the day?" Wait, isn't this overkill? That man sure is something, as expected of a strong believer… I think.

When I turn my head to her direction, Chris is looking at me with an amazed expression once again.

"Kouta-san… I apologize for being rude but, you're way reliable than I expected…"

"I'm gonna tell your followers about you being a loli then."

"No, no, no, anything but that!"

Then just answer my damned question, you fortune loli.

"Well, I think we cannot buy more equipment to start doing quests, so I believe taking on little and easy quests starting from tomorrow will do, thus I think I'm fine for today."

"So, you're fine with us going to the inn and end the day for now?"

She nodded happily, "Yes, that would be great."

That settles it, then.

* * *

When I asked the villagers about a decent inn that has reasonable price for a night, and specifically for novice adventurers, they all lead me and Chris to a single inn which we are standing in front of it right now.

"Yeah, this looks decent enough, and it looks not that bad."

"Kouta-san, it appears you are looking at the style for a long time now. Are you interested?"

I nodded, "Yeah. I am interested in whatever medieval-related, must have been because of my school trip to Carcassonne in France…"

"Karkasson?"

"That would be for another time, let's go."

As we went inside, the authentic aroma of… roses? Could be smelled across the lounge.

"Welcome to elves' inn. Do you want to rent a room?"

Who greeted me is a beautiful girl with fair skin and smooth, green hair in a ponytail. What caught my attention is her long ears. That's right, an actual elf!

"Yeah. We are planning to stay here for a night or two, at least until we can get a decent amount of money for equipments and such."

After that, the elf lady explains which suites are available, but the problem is…

All standard single rooms are full, and what's worse is that they are still renovating the twin rooms!

"Kouta-san, what should we do…"

Obviously, sleeping on the sideroad is out of option, and now way am I gonna let an actual goddess sleep in a stable!

"I-is there any other suites available?" there must be some way or another.

"Well… there is one more single room available, but it's a little…"

"I-It's okay! We will take it, right, Kouta-san?"

"Y-yeah, if you're fine with it. We'll stay here for… two nights, please."

The elf lady smiles, "Very well. That would be 75.000 Eris. The room is on the second floor and here is the key." 75.000 is okay, I suppose.

I gave her the money and me and Chris went upstairs.

"Hmm… this stairway… where have I seen this design, I wonder?"

"Kouta-san?"

"Ah, it's nothing. Let's move on."

The inn is somewhat little compared to the other buildings, so obviously there are few rooms in here. Our room is… Room 205. For your information, 205 means the fifth room of the second floor. My friend who is aiming to be a manager in a popular hotel in Japan told me this information.

I unlock the door and let Chris went inside first.

As I followed suit, I feel like my jaw is going to drop at any second.

"This room is worth more than 75.000!"

Indeed, even though the building of the inn itself looks like a very classic one I could find on Earth, this room is way more modern compared to the inn itself.

A queen-sized bed with snow white bedsheets, two pillows and two bolsters, accompanied by a bedside table near said bed.

A simple cupboard made out of wood with what appears to be copper ornaments, and a white long chair. There is also a door that probably leads to the restroom.

Holy shit, I'm okay with paying 75.000 for this.

"This is beautiful… of course, this is because of my luck!"

"What did you say?"

"Nothing!"

I sighed as Chris happily sits on the bed. I open the curtains and the open up the window, and immediately the bright sunset greets my face.

"Oh yeah, Chris. One of the adventurers told me there's a public bath near here, you can go there if you want to. I'm fine just by washing my face before going to bed."

"Ah, then I'll go there."

I waved at her as she went outside. Oh yeah, I told her to get some milk for me as well, I knew it's a staple thing in public baths.

"Now then… lets do a recap. First, I've made a reckless choice by choosing Eris instead of some overpowered bullshit that will probably makes it easier to defeat the Demon King. And now, I've become a thief, and I'm still at Level 1. Lunch somehow gave me 250 XP, but…" I take out my adventurer card.

"…I need 350 more to gain a level."

As I put away my card on the bedside table, I noticed something under the bed.

"…Not gonna hurt anyone by checking out."

I pull the thing out. It's a little bit heavy though.

"God, look at all the dusts forming…" A wooden box.

It seems very old, due to cracks here and there, not to mention the dirty stains here and there.

It doesn't seem to be locked though, as the slot is very rusty.

"Please don't be a hidden bomb…" I closed my eyes as I open the box!

…

Nothing happened.

"Phew. Now what do we have here…"

There's a suspicious-looking bottle, a dagger complete with its case and a letter.

"I don't know why, but I guess this is like a rare find in some dungeon."

I took the letter and opened it.

' _The dagger in this box is what I asked for when I started my life here. But as I expected, I didn't have the will to start my journey to defeat the Demon King. I gave up. Who cares about this world's fate? I'd rather live as a merchant because I have extraordinary luck stats and intelligence. I hear there's a popular shop owned by a powerful wizard here, so I'll start my life from there. For those who found this box, I have set a magic barrier so only those who are Archpriests or Archwizards could open this box by default. The dagger is a powerful craft so it's a good start for novices. The bottle? It contains a magical potion that gives you 50 Skill Points. I stole it from an Archwizard that has a weird name. Probably from Crimson Demon Village. Ah whatever, do what you please with these items._ _'_

Wow, this guy is more hopeless than I am.

But still.

50 Skill Points are huge, you can instantly learn advanced magic and you'll have some spare points left. Or that's what I think.

"…I'll keep the bottle for later. The dagger though…" I examined the dagger.

It's still pretty sharp, and the cloth that wraps around the handle is still comfortable.

The case is like a holster made for guns, as you can attach it to your belt.

"Pretty cool. Thanks for the item, scaredy-cat."

Now, the next thing I have received is the bottle which, as the letter states, holds a potion that will give me 70 Skill Points.

From what I've seen in RPG games, things like these who are essentially code-breaking items tend to be dangerous. What if it's potion? What if it's expired? What if it's potion and it's also expired? Wait that would make the poison less deadly.

"I'll just wait for Chris to come back, then I'll talk about it with her."

"Talk with me about what, Kouta-san?"

"GAH!" For heaven's sake, stop scaring me!

"Ah, it's you. I found something under the bed. A wooden box, to be exact. Inside of the box is this dagger I'm currently holding and also this bottle. It says that this bottle will give me 50 Skill Points if I drink its contents. I'm scared of it turning out to be poison so I thought I'd wait for you to get back but here you are."

"I see… ah, here's the warm milk you asked me to bring."

"Thanks."

The two of us sits on the bed and drinks a bottle of milk each. Tasty.

I just hope it's not bizarre milk or the like.

"Kouta-san, I've sensed the contents of the bottle and thankfully, it is not poison, so I think you can drink it."

Hearing her words, I look at the bottle.

It's roughly the size of your ordinary cough syrup bottle, but when I shake the bottle I could tell that it has a thick texture, almost like honey.

"You sure I'm not going to kill myself from drinking this?"

"I'm sure…. Probably."

"What was that?"

"Nothing!"

I open the bottle.

"Here goes nothing…"

*Gulp!* *Gulp!* *Gulp!*

"H-how does it taste?"

"Terrible. It's like drinking cobra blood." It does taste like cobra blood though. Never thought I would experience that again.

"Did you feel your stats rising?"

I hummed while taking my adventurer card.

"….I'm level 10 now. And I have 50 Skill Points!" I feel like I've overdone it now.

"Congratulations, Kouta-san! ….eh, but your stats are still the same…"

True that, my stats are still the same. Man my luck is some depressing material.

"Well, now I have the rights to learn the three basic skills of thief, let's see…"

[Steal], [Lurk], and [Enemy Detection].

As the counter lady from the guild told me, these three skills are very important for the thief class.

And they're very cheap too, 1 Skill Point for each Skill!

But [Steal]'s effectiveness is based on my luck, and my luck is very poor.

"Screw it, I'll unlock them."

I swiped my finger on each of their names, and then pressed the image of (apparently) my head.

…

"Nice. I have learned the three of them." I'm feeling like I could defeat any kinds of monsters now.

Chris closed her mouth as she yawns.

"Sleepy?"

"Y-yeah, I think I will get some rest…" She drowsily replied as she laid down on the bed.

I guess I'll do the same.

No, please don't call the FBI of this world. I beg of you.

"….Hey, Chris."

"Yes?"

I hesitate for a moment, but decided to ask anyway: "Your job as a goddess… is it hard?"

"You were actually the one hundredth people that I have met, Kouta-san. I'm basically a new goddess."

"I see…"

We remained silent after this.

…

This is awkward.

"…Sorry. Recalling what I did to you, I probably ruined your entire career and that's a huge dick move from me. Sorry."

"No, no. I was surprised at first, but my Senpai is still up there so I think I can support you with less worries."

Even after I've dragged her from her comfort zone, she's able to say things like that. She's too kind to be true. Or maybe it's because women around my age are all thots.

"…Thanks. Good night, Eris-sama."

As I drift off to sleep, I can vaguely hear her reply.

"Good night as well, Kouta-san."

* * *

"What's with all the ruckus?"

It's currently 8 in the morning and the guild is noisier than usual. Well, I've been here once so I don't have the rights to say that.

I turn to see Chris, who has the same confused look as mine.

"Oh, so this is the newcomer from the so-called 'distant land'."

Walking towards me and Chris is a man with the most disturbingly annoying face I've ever seen.

Dirty-blonde hair, blue eyes, and a full set of armor painted in blue and gold. Not to mention black undergarments and coat hanging around from his shoulders with the same color, added with a loose red scarf around his neck.

Goddammit, my second day in this fantasy world and I'm already facing smug face prince.

"That would be the two of us. Name's Minazaki Kouta, and the girl besides me is Chris. I'm a thief while she's an-"

"Archpriest, right?" Oi, you have no rights to cut my introduction.

"My name is Kyoya. Mitsurugi Kyoya, I'm basically the strongest adventurer in this town, serving under the Swordmaster class. Archpriest Chris-sama, would you like to join my party instead? Such advanced Class is meaningless when paired with the filthiest there is. With my Demonic sword Gram, we can win trough every hard quest easily! I will be sure to give you the best equipment there is."

Damn, talk about being a rude ballsack.

"Listen here, Taddle Fantasy. Chris is my younger step sister, so you better step off or I'll punch your smug ass face!"

The crowd within the guild murmurs as I stepped in.

"Oh? And what can a lowlife do against me? Steal my sword? Silently escaping from this place?"

That's it. I'm pissed.

"Fine. You want Chris so bad? Then let's play a game. We're going to test out whether the thief class is really crappy or not. You may attack me with that cursed dildo or whatever but let me warn you that I have a walking force of luck on my side, stealing your item will be a breeze. If I can steal your sword and hit you with it, you'll pay me 500.000 Eris. If I can't do it, Chris is for your party."

Kyoya smirks, "Fine. Then I shall add one million more to the bet. My Gram is a most valuable sword there is, you can easily gain one million if you sell it."

"So, you're saying I can do whatever I want with that toothpick of yours?"

"Pick one between dildo and toothpick, fool! But yes, that is what I said."

 **[Mock quest(?): Defeat Mitsurugi Kyoya in a nerfed battle!]  
[Quest Reward: 500.000 Eris and Demonic Sword, Gram]**

And this, my friends, is the first real activity I've done in this fantasy world.

Both me and Kyoya are standing outside the guild now, each of us holding our respective weapons.

I've told Chris to secretly buff my luck with her [Blessing], so there's no way I can lose.

My left hand is readying itself for me to cast [Steal] the moment one of us take the first step.

I can imagine Gram being heavy, so all I can do with it is dealing a single, powerful strike.

"You'll be sure to regret this, thief."

"Oh I'm gonna resend those words to your face!" I took a sprint towards him!

"What the-!"

My agility and dexterity are near perfect, making me very agile when evading and running to my opponents.

His class may be an advanced one, but Gram is pretty much useless against fast opponents!

I let my right hand dance in the air, my dagger dangerously creeping towards his neck at a fast pace.

You may be able to evade my randomized attacks but you won't be able to evade this one!

"Your sword is mine! [Steal]!"

My left hand begins to shine in a dazzling white color, making Kyoya close his eyes for a while.

"Now eat this! Kanonas Kathartherio!"

I hit Kyoya's body with great force thanks to Gram. Thank god I'm left-handed.

As the smug face drops into the ground, I maintain my stance with the help from the sword.

Oh, he's unconscious, as expected of the great me.

The crowd cheers as me and Chris jumps in joy.

 **[Mock quest(?): Defeat Mitsurugi Kyoya in a nerfed battle!]**

 **[Cleared!]**

Back at the guild…

Everyone is sitting next to me and Chris, happily laughing together while drinking beer. Seriously, it's still early in the morning!

"Oi, Oi, Oi! This Kouta fellow is a fine lad! Defeating Kyoya in one single hit ain't something that is easy!" said one of the adventurers.

I look over to Chris, "Isn't this great?"

She nodded, "Yes! But I would love to see you not using tricks like me casting [Blessing] on you next time, Kouta-san."

"Well, I am weak in terms of Mana and luck."

I stand up and raised my beer, "Alright everyone! Before me and Chris started our first quest, lets drink!"

"Oorahhh!"

In the end, both me and Chris wasted our second day drinking and partying in the guild until midnight.

 **A/N: Ahahahaha what am I doing with my life.**

 **I want to say that I will** _ **try**_ **my hardest to make this story as different as possible compared to the Light Novel, hence why I introduced Kyoya this early. I hated him so I guess he's not going to appear sooner or later. And do expect some brother-sister relationship between Kouta and Eris/Chris, I guess. No, I'm not into incest. Sorry for making Eris/Chris seems out of character, I guess? Well she tends to be energetic in the Light Novel so I think I'm safe for now.**

 **That's all from me. StarKnight07 signing out!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Quick A/N. I want to say thank you to Amatsumi for giving me questions, and I gotta say… I haven't think that much lol. For starters, if we're talking whether this story is canon or not, I'll gladly say it's not canon, although I will use some elements from the Light Novel (The two things I won't use are Kazuma and Aqua, and I'll create more** **crappy** **ways to expand this story further), about the time setting… it's the same time during Kazuma's arrival in the world of Konosuba. About the Skill Points potion, I make it work differently compared to the one from Bakuen! Series. With that out of the way, let's start the story.**

* * *

"….Kouta-san."

"…Please wake up."

I slowly rubbed my tired eyes before opening them.

Chris is in front of me, looking at me with a worried expression before letting out a sigh of relief.

"….Ahh shit, I passed out from overdrinking huh?"

"Yes. I had to ask one of the adventurers to carry you here. I have read that you love to drink in your previous life, but please don't overdo it. Your health is also important if we want to defeat the Demon king!"

Wow, she's actually scolding me.

The two of us are currently at our room in the inn we're staying. The warm ray from the sun coming through the windows tell me it's still morning. Probably… 9 AM?

"Of course I'm scolding you! You have wasted your mana when you used [Steal] on Mitsurugi Kyoya's Gram, and you drank too much without proper rest!"

I try to calm her down: "Hey, hey! Let's all calm down a bit, okay? So? What's the aftermath?"

Chris told me everything that happened. How I tried to cast [Steal] even though I have few mana left on the waitresses, the other adventurers and thieves started a drinking contest and so on. Basically, it was a bunch of mess. And I can't believe I showed my pervert attitude when I'm drunk. I thought I have talked about it with my doctor.

Wait, I feel like something is missing…

Ah, that's right.

"What about the cursed stick or whatever that Gram thing is? Did you sell it? Speaking of money, did you get the 500.000 Eris?"

"For starters, it's a Demonic Sword, and yes I got the money from the counter lady. Her name is Luna by the way, it means-"

"Yes, I know Luna means Moon, I learned Latin. You didn't answer my question about whether you sold the sword or not though."

Chris seems… uneasy? Awkward?

"W-well… about the sword…"

I don't like where this is going.

"You can tell me about it. Did you sell it to some random merchant but the sword didn't even reach one million?"

Chris shakes her head.

"The thing is, it seems one of Mitsurugi Kyoya's teammate took Gram away the second I looked away… I'm sorry, Kouta-san…"

"It's okay. I'm not interested in swords anyways."

"Eh?"

I stand up while rubbing my stomach, "We'll go to a blacksmith to get ourselves items, and then take some quests on the guild. But first, I believe I have an appointment with miss nature…"

"…Miss nature?"

* * *

In every RPG games, it's best to prepare yourself with the finest equipment around.

With that logic, I decided to visit the blacksmith in this town.

My newly made friends from the guild told me that the old man is the greatest blacksmith around, and it surprised me how easily I made friends here compared to making friends in Japan. The fantasy world knows no bounds, I guess.

"Kouta-san, you seem to have great knowledge about this world." Chris started a conversation.

"Not really, finding every information possible has been my hobby since I was a kid. That's probably why I had few friends when I lived on Earth. And this world reminds me a lot of the games I used to play back then, so it's… one of my advantages, I think."

"Speaking about this world, you're the one who sent people to this world after they died, right?"

Chris nodded, "Yes. Although I am still inexperienced. Come to think of it, I was supposed to give you a book that lists the magical items and divine skills you can obtain, but I forgot…"

I pat her back, "No worries, you are inexperienced after all. Ah, here we are."

The weaponry shop looks like a building from Dark Souls, I'd give this building a rating of 9 out of 10 if they added a demon skull in front of the door.

As Chris and I entered the shop, the blacksmith greeted us with a smile.

"Hey there, welcome to my shop. Oh? Unfamiliar faces I see. Newcomers?"

I nodded, "Yeah. Coming from the sunrise land. Anyways, we're looking for new weapons. Any cool ones for Thief class and Archpriest?"

"Sure do. I have the finest quality of staves, wands and throwing knives. Let me see…"

The old man- I'll call him old man Smith. Get it? Smith from blacksmith? God I'm bad at making puns. Does that even count as one?

"Here it is! I call this the Wand of Gavrail, it took a lot of effort to craft this wand. I used a pure magic stone that could enhance any types of magic, especially strengthening magic."

…

I definitely know that wand.

"Waah! It looks beautiful!" Chris seems to like it though.

"Right? This little lady has great taste! Just for you, I'll give this wand for 120.000 Eris. Sounds good or nah?"

120.000, huh… It is indeed a reasonable price, and it can also boost Chris who is currently weaker than before we met.

"Chris, do you want it?" It's best to ask her first.

With sparkles in her eyes, she looks at me, "Can I?"

Well, who am I to deny a goddess' wish? I don't want a divine punishment or some sorts to slap my face.

"Old man, we'll gladly take that wand."

With the wand with (presumably) godly powers in her hand, Chris looks like a real Archpriest now.

Although, Archpriests are supposed to use staves but whatever.

"And what about you? Throwing knives? Traps?"

I shook my head, "I don't need them, I do need a bow and a set of arrows."

Smith seems confused, so does Chris.

"Kouta-san, you are a thief, not an archer, right?"

"Well, back in _our_ land there are thieves that uses bows, no?" I pressed the 'our' part a bit so that Chris understands.

"I-I see! Yes, certainly!"

"Uh huh… Well, I did make one last week. I call it…"

"Let me guess, the Bow of Favonius?"

If this old man uses a name of some angel for a magic stick, I'm not surprised if he named a bow after a Roman god that acts as the god of west wind.

"That's a great name, but no. Its name is Zephyr." Said the blacksmith with weird naming sense as he brought a bow.

The bow looks just like your ordinary bows for the Olympics, the recurved style. This type of bow stores a lot of energy and also delivers energy more compared to the equivalent straight-limbed ones. What makes 'Zephyr' unique is the feather-like design on the limbs. Unlike the modern recurved bows, this bow doesn't have a clicker.

"Hmm… the bow sure looks strong. And it's a recurved, too. Old man, can I hold it?"

He nodded and gave me the bow. Quite light.

"The grip feels nice, and since the edges of the limbs are made out of iron, I think I can modify it a bit…"

Oh? Seems old man Smith is impressed.

"You sure know a lot, kiddo. That's right, you can modify it but that'll cost a lot. And here are the arrows. I made it with a special material that could absorb magical energy, so that it becomes stronger against monsters that are weak to magical attacks."

"Niiiice. How much for this bow and the arrows?"

"Bows are easy to make, and so I don't see the problem with giving you a cheap price. The arrows, however, is pretty hard to make. I'd say 230.000 for the bow and ten special made arrows, how about that?"

Sounds like a good deal to me.

And so, I gave Smith 350.000 Eris, and both me and Chris are ready to fight anything this world throw at us!

…I hope.

...

It didn't take us more than ten minutes before we're back at the guild once again.

And before I forget, it's nice of Smith to give me a quiver that is made of leather and he also gave me fifteen wooden arrows for free.

Now I'm standing in front of the board that has quest papers pinned on it alongside Chris.

Let's see…

Slay fifteen goblins… pick up ten special herbs… teaching swordmanship? And purifying a dirty lake full of crocodiles and escorting the dead to heaven.

I don't like any of those quests.

I also don't think Chris is capable of purifying the lake as she is the goddess of luck and I also can't protect her from crocodiles. And teaching someone how to use a sword is not my thing.

"Uh… there's no exploration quests, huh…" This is definitely bad. Picking up herbs is easy but the reward won't be enough, and two beginners slaying goblins doesn't sound like a good idea. I hear there's a little surprise when you kill those mobs, anyways.

"Ah, Kouta-san, how about this one?" Chris asked as she pointed at a quest paper.

"Hm?"

The paper Chris pointed at says:

 _ **[There's a minotaur rampaging on my ancestor's old ruins. Please defeat it and you may explore the ruins for treasure after you are done dealing with the minotaur. Completion reward: 150.000 Eris]**_

A minotaur, huh? The mythical creature that dwelt within the labyrinth created by father and son, Daedalus and Icarus. It was later on became a big hit in the 20th century fantasy genre fiction.

Yes, I remembered almost all the useless info there is. I thank my free time and Wikipedia for this.

"Well… it is a minotaur, I'd love to kill one. Not to mention we're free to explore the ruins later. Let's do the quest."

Chris nodded and take the paper to… Luna, was it?

As Chris waited in front of the counter, I continue to scan through the quest papers.

Most of the quests are for beginners, but there are some quests that are for experienced adventurers as well.

"Kouta-san! We're good to go now~!"

I nodded, "Alright, let's go!"

Getting approval from "big assets" Luna, our next destination is the ruins.

It's our turn to kill the Minos.

* * *

"I'll fight the minotaur, and you back me up. You fine with that, Chris?"

Making fighting plans along the way is important, do not fight without plans if you don't want to die.

Except if you're barbarians.

"Yes. I'll grant you lots of buff spells!"

"What are you, Merlin?"

I laugh at how Chris always puts on a confused face whenever I say something straight out of pop culture references and legends. You may call me a nerd on top of a failure, I don't mind.

"Kouta-san always says weird things, but I'm curious about their meanings."

Well, I am from another world after all.

"Then we'll talk about my world when we have the time. But for now, it's time to put our serious face."

"Yes!"

Of course, in the back of my head I know fighting a minotaur is not an easy thing.

If I remember correctly, minotaurs are capable to kill skilled warriors with ease. Even the hero Theseus won because he 'cheated' somehow.

But, with my agility I can at least evade most of the bull's attacks.

So, what I'm going to use is a hit and run tactic. With the help of Chris' buffing spells, I'll slowly damage the minotaur.

That's our plan for this quest. Simple and effective, I should say.

I'll try to lower its defense first by shooting arrows at it, and when the slight opening reveals itself I'll end the fight with my dagger.

"…Ah, there it is." whispered Chris as we stopped walking.

The ruins seem to be some remains of a mansion, I could tell some parts of the mansion were made from limestones.

And standing among the ruins is…

"What the hell, that's not even close to the minotaurs in my books…"

The targeted minotaur is wielding a sword on its right hand, and axe on its left.

Hold on, why is the monster wielding two weapons?

Well, it can't be helped.

"…Eris, I hope you know this already, but minotaur is a powerful beast, able to sense its enemies from afar. I want you to stay within a safe distance so that you can use buffing spells on me, I'll use a hit and run tactic just like what we planned earlier. Got it?"

"It's been awhile since you called me Eris, Kouta-san! Alright, leave it to me!"

As Chris secretly chants [Blessing] and [Mana Boost] on me, I started my move.

Walking while holding my breath, I readied my dagger.

The good thing about this class is that I'm able to sneak my way to attack, strength could easily be defeated by speed, after all.

I'm approximately two meters away, God this is scary! Even though the minotaur is looking to the other side, it's still scary!

Calm down, you have solo'd multiple raid bosses in that game before! Think Kouta, think!

'Here goes nothing…'

I ran as fast as I could while overclocking my brain, and when I'm close-!

"…!"

The bull swings its axe towards my direction!

*BAM!*

Okay, this is way scarier than I thought!

I rushed my way to hide behind a boulder.

"[Hide]! Holy hell I almost died!"

That was really stupid of me!

The minotaur searched around by walking aimlessly, its crimson eyes shining with anger.

I silently reached for my bow, and I aim at its body.

*SHOOT!*

The minotaur parried my arrow with its sword, but since I'm still using [Hide], it doesn't know that I'm here.

'Time to try again!'

To my advantage, [Hide] can be activated all the time as long as I have the mana to keep it on, and Chris' [Mana Boost] is a very powerful spell.

I ran while letting out as little noise as possible to other boulders and ruined pillars so that my [Hide] can still be activated. As the distance between me and the monster becoming even closer-!

I ran towards it!

*SLASH!*

The bull roared as I successfully slashed its right leg, and I evaded at the right moment before its sword hits me.

Rolling on the ground while readying my bow once more, I then shoot another arrow.

"…!"

Wow, that was the most unholy scream I ever heard.

"Let's keep going!"

I continue to attack its various areas, mainly its legs and arms while cautiously evading its deadly weapons.

I don't know if I'm lucky because of Chris, but the minotaur couldn't even hit me at all.

Did I just raise a flag? I probably did.

"Guh!" Okay, I did.

The minotaur hits my stomach with the blunt side of its axe with great force, making me lose my breath.

"Kouta-san!"

Idiot, don't come here!

I take a sprint before the minotaur hits the ground with his axe, making a loud sound.

"Chris! What are you doing?! I'm fine thanks to your spells, so back off!"

I shoot my arrows to the minotaur, but the monster effortlessly parried them with its weapons.

"Ah! You called me with Chris again!" That's a problem for you?!

"Watch out!" I held Chris' hand and pulled her towards me just before the minotaur's attack hits her.

"T-thank you…"

"No big deal. But still… how do we even beat him?"

My attacks lands most of the time, but the minotaur still stands tall.

Hmm? Wait a minute…

"…If I can use [Steal], then…"

"…Chris! Give me [Mana Boost] one more time! I want to go home after this!"

"A-ah, Kouta-san! Mou, fine! [Mana Boost]!"

Raising my left hand, I focused all of my mana.

"This is the end! [Steal]!"

* * *

"My shoulder hurts…"

I try not to cry as I dragged along the sword and axe of the now slain minotaur back to Axel town.

"S-sorry, Kouta-san! Let me heal it again!"

No, I think it's because of my recklessness.

When I used [Steal] back during I fight the minotaur, I intend to steal its sword or axe.

But it didn't work because my luck buff ran out.

Instead, I got hit on my shoulder by the minotaur's axe and I stole what appeared to be the monster's life source.

A manatite crystal, is what Chris told me.

It's basically an alternative source for magic if your mana storage is too small. So that minotaur was 'alive' using this crystal.

When Chris and I investigated the body of said monster, I could see some battle scars across its body, clearly telling the two of us how old the monster is.

Must be painful, having forced to fight and live again and again, carrying those scars.

And the crystal is a high quality one too, I think. Let's see if I can sell it.

The sad thing is, there isn't anything valuable other than the manatite crystal and the minotaur's weapons, which sucks.

"Still, that was lucky of me, huh? The Minos didn't even aim for my head, just like that character portrayed by Chris Hemsworth. But the good thing is, I'm the protagonist here and not some weird result between a ballsack and purple Play-Doh."

"I really don't understand what you are talking most of the time, but it seems you're happy!" Why, thank you.

"Hmm, guess you don't."

"But Kouta-san, why are you bringing the minotaur's weapons?"

"Good question, Chris. I don't know as well. But my instinct tells me these two babies can become one and can also help our mission to defeat the Demon king. It's best to scavenge everything we can bring."

When I look at her, Chris has the same amazed look like yesterday.

"Amazing! You are more reliable than I thought!"

"Oi, repeat that again, but slowly this time."

"N-no thanks."

Seriously, is this girl really a goddess?

"Hey, Kouta-san. I can clearly see how you questions my authority as a goddess, you know! I-I may be a bad one at it, b-but I really am one! Sheesh, I'm afraid you're going to bully me just like my Senpai…"

"Ah… I'm sorry, then. Speaking about your senior, what does she look like? Does she wear pads as well?"

I jokingly teased the loli goddess as she punched my arm lightly.

"Well… Aqua-senpai is a beautiful goddess, as her name implies, she's the goddess of water."

Goddess of water, huh?

"Must be fun, having such convenient power. Water is important, after all." Indeed, it is.

"Anyways, let's go to the guild for lunch and get ourselves the quest rewards."

"Right!"

Along the way, I can see people doing their daily lives as usual, but I always think of them as NPCs.

Sometimes the kids would come to me and Chris, even though they surrounded Chris most of the time.

It's okay, I don't want to be framed as a pedophile.

It didn't take too much time until the two of us arrived at the guild.

Even from outside, the extravagant noise could still be heard clearly. I need to check my ears later, just in case.

The two of us went inside.

"Alright. Chris, please go to uhh… Luna, was it? Tell her about the quest. I'll get us a lunch. What do you want for lunch?"

"I will leave that to you, Kouta-san."

"Uh huh…" well, okay then.

I placed the weapons on the ground. God these weapons are heavy!

I sit on the chair while sighing heavily while rubbing my wrists, I need to take a huge break.

"Are you ready to take an order?"

Out of nowhere, a cute waitress came towards me with a huge smile, hands ready to write my order.

"Ah, can I have… you know what, two standard meals and one cup of black coffee and also a cup of tea."

The waitress smiled brightly, "Certainly!"

Ah, such pure smile…

I see the waitress as she went by to the kitchen area.

"Kouta-san? Is there anything wrong?" Chris came from out of nowhere and sits to my right.

"Ah, no, it's nothing. Did we get the money?"

Chris nodded happily, "Yes! 150.000 Eris, and Luna-san told me that it's ok for us to keep the manatite crystal!"

Wow, that's nice of her.

"Well, in any case, lunch will be here soon. I don't know your tastes so I just told the waitress to get us two standard meals."

The two of us talked about various random things before our lunch came in.

When the cute waitress from before came to us with our lunch, the guild's doors suddenly opens up with a huge sound.

Someone's angry.

"Minazaki Kouta! Are you here?!"

Who opened the door furiously is none other than… Kenji? Soriz? Uhhh… who is he again?

"Hold on buddy. Who are you again?"

"Mitsurugi! Mitsurugi Kyoya!"

Ahh… right. Mitsurugi Kyoya. The Japanese who was reincarnated just like me, although he has more advantage with his 'cheat code'.

"What kind of problems do you wanna make with me today, huh? Just so you know, I have killed a minotaur today so I'm tired. Let me and Chris eat our lunch in peace."

Seriously, you have the feel of some generic harem MC.

"Don't joke with me! Where is it? Where's my Cursed Sword Gram?!"

"Ha? I don't know where your tier 0 sword is, and I seriously don't care. Now get lost, you don't want to be bullied by a novice again, right?"

Some people sneers at Mitsurugi. No, I'm dead serious right now.

"What did you say?! Don't joke with me! Gram is an important item for me to defeat the Demon king! Aqua-sama has sent me to this world to defeat that thing once and for all, and you're here joking around using a Thief class?!"

That's it, I'm real pissed.

"Listen here, you generic MC cunt. If you're too dependable on that silly sword of yours, then I guess you're not worthy enough to defeat the Demon king. Also, what goddess sent you here again, Aqua? I guess she has a bad taste at picking a high school kid into this pile of mess! She probably is beautiful but I can proudly say her screws are fucking loose!"

"Kouta-san, that's uncalled for!"

Becoming more agitated than before, Mitsurugi grabbed my jacket.

"How dare you disrespect Aqua-sama like that! She was the one who kindly revived me after my death, and you are telling me she has bad taste!"

"Yeah, I've said it! If you don't like me, then answer me correctly! Where do you think Gram currently is right now?! I'll give you exactly 10 seconds!"

Don't think you can play around with me just because you're a Swordmaster.

"Y-Y-You stole it right? I knew you do!"

"….pfft."

"Mitsurugi-san! I should tell you that one of your teammates took your Cursed Sword Gram away, now stop grabbing… stop grabbing Onii-san like that!"

"Eh?"

That's not me, by the way. It was Mitsurugi, but I'm shocked to hear her saying that as well.

The guild becomes silent when Chris screamed angrily at Mitsurugi, even Luna-san and the other staffs stopped working at their tasks.

"As expected of my adopted little sister. Yeah, that's right. I'm not the one who took away your cheat item, nor am I the one who sold it to some merchant even if I do need more money. You see, Mitsurugi? You don't need to be so salty about losing to a beginner."

Clicking his tongue, he lets go of my jacket and slowly walks away and left through the guild's door.

"Jesus, talk about some bad manners."

"You said it, kid. He is one of the strongest adventurers here, but sometimes he acts all mighty around people." Said a ruffian as he walked towards me and Chris.

"Yeah, I can see that."

"Anyway, I see some potential in your eyes. Welcome to the gates of hell! Hahahaha!"

And he walked away without saying another word. Typical artisan weaver.

"Kouta-san…"

"I'm not angry. Let's go to the inn. I'm tired."

I asked one of the guild staffs to deliver the minotaur's weapons to Smith, and then Chris and I left the guild. Oh yeah, I also paid for the lunch. 10000 Eris is pretty much cheap for a satisfying lunch.

The sun slowly retreats back as the sky turns orange.

"Can't believe time progresses this fast." I yawned as I said that.

"You're right. I think I will go to the public bath again. Kouta-san, you want to come?"

I nodded, "Yeah. Anything for you, _imouto-chan._ "

"Aaaaaaa, stop it!"

Running, Chris went ahead to the public bath.

"Hmm… I doubt the two of us are strong enough. In order to defeat the Demon king… I guess recruiting some adventurers to expand our team would be nice…"

Basic logic here, but when you're given a grand task of defeating an overpowered opponent, it is best to gather allies under the same flag as you. That way, it would be easier to defeat said opponent.

That said, I don't think I have what it takes to team up with other people, considering my friends kicked me from my own job.

But, this is an alternate fantasy world, after all.

I just need to do my hardest.

…

The public bath is the same as any other public baths that you can find in Japan. Oh, it's the _Sentō_ style, too. Classic.

There are three doors that leads to the bathing area, male's area, female's area, and…

"Wow, a mixed bath area." I don't want to trigger some romance flags yet, though.

Taking myself a towel and basket from the receptionist, I walked inside the male's bathing area. The old lady gives me a calming, elderly smile.

She reminds me of my late grandmother, I wonder why.

Now, clearly there are set of rules you need to follow in a public bath.

Since it's a public area, you need to clean yourself before making yourself relax on the hot bath.

Taking off my clothes and putting them on my basket, I cover my private region with my towel.

There are only three other people in the bath other than myself.

I sit on one of the wooden stalls and clean my whole body with warm water. There is a soap ready to use as well. The first step to do after being naked is to clean your whole body with warm water and soap. Public baths are, well, for public use so you don't want to spread your bacteria to other people and they don't want to make you sick as well. Common sense.

There are shampoo bottles, toothpaste and toothbrush as well. If they have shaving cream and razor it would be complete.

Now that my body is clean, I slowly slide myself to the hot bath after putting my towel on the rim of the bath. It is not a good idea to bring the towel into the water with you.

Aaah, how relaxing…

"As expected, a fantasy world's public bath is more divine compared the ones from Japan… _gokuraku, gokuraku…_ " I can tell the water is one of the best quality around, as well.

"Oh? I haven't see your face in here." One of the guys spoke to me. He has short blonde hair with red eyes.

"Yeah, I just arrived on this town. Name is Kouta, by the way. Rookie adventurer. I mean thief."

"I see, you're an adventurer, as well! My name is Dust. The one with short brown hair is Taylor and this guy's Keith."

Taylor and Keith greet me with a nod and a smile, which I reply with a smile as well.

"I assume you three are teammates?"

Taylor nodded, "Yes. Although we're far from perfect."

Talk about humble. I like it.

"Right. About teams, though. I'm in need of a member, any tips on recruiting one?"

"Well, you just need to make a request to the guild, and you can place your notice on the board." Answered Keith.

Hmm… I think I can get lots of people wanting to join because of Chris' class. Should I do it tomorrow?

"By the way, you need at least four members in a team to complete hard tasks, such as defeating huge swarms of monsters. Dividing the reward is a pain though."

Taylor rolled his eyes listening Dust's complaint, "That's just because you kept on stirring trouble, making debts everywhere."

I laugh as Dust tries to come up with reasons saying that it's a necessity for his lifestyle etc. etc.

Something tells me that Dust is more than he seems to appear, though. But its not good to make assumptions about someone you just met.

"So, do you guys have more useful information for me? Like for instance, any information about the Demon king?"

Eyes wide, the three of them looked at me with surprised faces.

"Hold on! You want to try your luck defeating the Demon king?!"

"Countless knights and adventurers alike died by the hands of the king's generals. I'd say it's a bad idea opposing them."

"Taylor has a point, Kouta. If you're not strong enough to defeat his generals, it's best to just wait for the legendary hero from the legends."

Well, I don't think I'm the one, but I'm sure I'm on the so-called "Legendary hero" stereotype, getting a second chance to live again and all.

And judging from their intense tone, even the generals of said king are strong enough to wipe out a town or two.

"I see, so it's a bad idea. Alright, thanks for the warning. I'll be leaving now. Stay safe, you three."

"You too! Ah, be sure to visit a certain magic shop in this town, the owner is very cute!"

I stand up and waved my hand at them and left the bathing area.

"…That was relaxing, though. It's been awhile since my last visit to a public bath." I wonder if there's an _onsen_ in this world, as well.

I wore my clothes in the changing room I rented.

My jacket is completely ruined, though. It's dirty and has some holes on it.

And my jeans are somewhat ruined as well, but I don't mind. But my jacket costed me a huge amount of yen because it's limited, dammit!

"No good coming from crying over a spilled whiskey. Speaking of whiskey, I think there are some good ones on the guild's pub."

I left the changing room and wait for Chris at the lounge.

The old lady here is very nice, by the way. She even gave me a candy.

Again, she reminds me of my late grandmother.

The lounge is less classic than the other rooms, though. There is a "vending machine" that sells drinks, both hot and cold. It's more of a stall than a "machine", but I call it as a vending machine because I like vending machines in general.

After twenty minutes had passed, Chris finally showed up.

But she's not alone.

Walking beside her is a short girl that has fair skin and long black hair and crimson eyes, one of them is covered by an eye patch. But what makes her stands out is her outfit.

An outfit commonly wore by a witch. A dress accompanied by a black cloak with gold borders, large sized belt and a pair of brown boots. She wore fingerless gloves, a black choker and a wizard hat.

No mistaking it, she's a wizard, or maybe a witch. Hell, what's the difference?

"Who's the new girl, Chris? Your new friend?"

Chris nods happily, "Yes. This girl is…"

Suddenly, the girl strikes a pose, covering her face with her left hand and pointed at me with her right.

"My name is Megumin! One who possess Explosion magic, who bears the title of an Archwizard! My fate is certain, and it is to give blessings to this world with my Explosions!"

…

Ah, I get it.

This girl is a total nutjob.

I've seen these kinds of people in Japan too, commonly found in local junior high schools.

A person who got the "Chuunibyou" syndrome.

"R-right. Megumin, was it? Nice to meet you. My name is Minazaki Kouta. I believe you are familiar with Chris already." It's best to act nice for now.

"You are right. Chris is nice enough to give me some food, so we're friends."

"Hold on! Did you bring a snack to the bathing area?! Chris, what the hell woman?! Ah, Obaa-san, I'm really sorry! Please forgive this foolish sister of mine!" I'm prepared to _dogeza_ right now!

"I-I didn't! I gave Megumin-san a snack when we were at the changing room!"

Oh, thank goodness.

"Please don't scare me like that. Anyway, Megumin. Where did you sleep? Ah, crap, that makes me sound like a sex offender… let me rephrase that, where will you stay for the night?"

"I usually sleep in the guild's lounge or in the stables."

"I see- wait, what?"

She nodded, "Is it that uncommon?"

"No, I mean, why not rent a room in some inn?"

"I don't have any money to rent one."

My lord, talk about depressing.

"H-how about your teammates?" Asked Chris to the Archwizard.

Megumin shook her head, "I don't belong to any teammates… It is because of my devastating power! They simply can't use my powers to the maximum output, due to their fear of the abyss!"

Uh huh…

When you're talking with a Chuunibyou, it's better to not ask about things that may trigger their insanity to show up.

Let's go with basic questions first.

"Megumin, can you kindly tell the two of us your parents' names?"

Hearing my question, Megumin strikes yet another pose.

"My mother's name is Yuiyui! And my father's name is Hyoizaburoo!"

Okay… let's go with another question.

"Where did you come from? Axel is a town for beginners, so an Archwizard should be a rare sight, yes?"

And another pose was made.

"I came from the magnificent village known as the Crimson Demon Village, home of powerful Archwizards! And I, Megumin, is the strongest Archwizard, for I am the one who wields Explosion magic!"

Hearing her answer, Chris' eyes shines with excitement, "Kouta-san! Kouta-san!"

"Yes, what is it?"

"She came from the Crimson Demon Village!"

What's so good about it? It sounds like a village full of neckbeards masturbating to anime girls.

Seeing my blank expression, Chris started explaining.

"Crimson Demon Village is respected for their people. All villagers are Archwizards by blood, having bigger mana capacity than other adventurers and they are of course experts at using intermediate to advanced magics! Also, Explosion is indeed a powerful spell, carrying a massive firepower equal to none, I heard that no one would try to unlock Explosion because of the huge responsibility they will bare as well."

I'm pretty sure no one would unlock the spell because it's going to frame them as terrorists. That, or the spell is so powerful they will drop dead like a bird getting hit by a brick after casting it.

"Where did you learn about that? More precisely, the Explosion Magic part."

"From Megumin-san."

The girl that calls herself the strongest Archwizard looked at me with a smug expression.

This is seriously bad. Even I cannot stand this… this… childish act.

I slowly grabbed Chris' hand, "W-well, it's nice having a new friend! Chris, you told me earlier you have a problem and needs my help, right? T-then, the two of us will go now, bye!"

I walk in a fast pace, slightly dragging Chris away with me until the two of us are outside the public bath.

"Kouta-san, is there a problem? You seem stressed out, although I believe people would feel relaxed after taking a bath in a public bath…"

I looked at her with twitching eyes, still dragging her away from the public bath.

"Yes! There is a problem! That loli is a freaking Chuuni! I've never met one after I dropped out from my first junior high school, you know! My god, that was unbearable. Note to the two of us; never make contact with another Chuuni. Ever."

Of course, I don't have any problem with the girl named Megumin. But chuunibyous in general is so irritating it makes me want to scratch my eyeballs.

"B-but… I already told her-"

"No buts! No buts from you, little girl! We're going to stay in our room, take a huge rest and we'll do another quest tomorrow and I'll make a request to the guild to find us new teammates!"

"But I'm a goddess~~!"

…..

It was probably nine pm right now.

I have locked the door, the windows and I have closed the curtains for further safety.

I still can't believe Chuunibyous also exists in this world.

Or it's probably thanks to someone who got reincarnated from Japan, but I don't think that's possible.

There's no way someone is dumb enough to do stunts like making a village full of strong, mentally ill wizards r-right?

Sitting on the long chair, Chris is eating what I bought for her to make her agree to my decision today.

"Seriously… bribing me with food… *munch* *munch* ….the bread is tasty, though."

I bought a bread filled with cream cheese for Chris and a bread filled with fish for myself.

"I'm sorry but please deal with it. Delusional kids are a pain, but delusional Archwizards is on a different matter of hazardous predicaments. If I am Isurugi, I'll probably stay away from that girl because her hazard level has reached its limit."

"Kouta-san, I don't get it."

"What I'm trying to say is I have a bad feeling about Megumin. It's best to avoid her for the long run."

Chris tilted her head, still eating the bread.

"But we needed more party members, right? And Archwizards are strong in general, wouldn't it be wise to ask her to join our party?"

Well, she has a point.

"True, but I don't want to do anything with someone who acts as if she has a demon trapped within her."

"Kouta-san, why don't you trust in Megumin-san? She's actually a nice girl who I think can get along with you nicely."

"Trust is not a problem, I mean if you trust her then I'll trust her as well. What I don't like is her reliability as an adventurer. I don't know her stats except for her huge mana pool and her destructive Explosion spell, although I still don't believe anything about her able to use whatever that magic is."

It was actually my mistake for not asking Megumin to show me her adventurer card. I wonder if I would think differently about her if I see her adventurer card.

"Hmm… you are right, Kouta-san. I'm sorry, I'm just happy I made a new friend. But defeating the Demon king is an important matter for the two of us, we shouldn't act too lightly."

Oh god, she just said that with a rejected tone. I'm not being too harsh on her, right?

I probably am but I hope I'm not rising up bad ending flags.

"Chris… no, Eris-sama, I'm sorry. That was rude of me."

The goddess before me waved her hand, "No, no! I believe what Kouta-san thinks is for the best. Defeating the Demon king is a hard thing, after all."

Speaking of him…

"Say, Eris-sama, what will happen if we successfully defeat the guy?"

"Well… naturally you can ask for one thing you want. And you can go back to Japan if you want to…"

I let out a deep sigh and walk towards the door.

"…I see. I will go to the guild to talk about the party recruitment, I believe they are still open. I'm not tired to go to bed for now so I'll go there tonight instead."

I left the room knowing that Chris is still staring at this direction.

Closing the door behind me, I start to make my way downstairs.

"One wish, huh… I don't have anything I want, though…"

With my head full of options regarding my wish that will eventually be a reality, I zipped up my jacket due to the cold temperature.

"…It was a grave mistake for pulling her along with me. She could have died back then."

Even though she's a goddess of luck, it doesn't mean she's safe enough living in a mortal world. I even made her weaker because of me bringing her.

That is something I would never put into consideration before everything is too late.

Why am I so immature sometimes?

I cursed myself over and over, walking to the guild.

I wonder if I will meet the Archwizard there.

 **A/N: Hey there, it's been awhile, eh?**

 **I know that using bows in the Konosuba universe requires the Archer class, or the [Bow] skill, but I want to make use of Kouta's near perfect dexterity, so I changed that rule.**

 **About Megumin, she is an interesting character, and since I have reread Volume 9 of the main light novel, I am thinking how not to ruin the mature feel of Megumin, so sorry if her introduction felt a bit awkward. The reason why Kouta hates Chuunibyou people will be explained later on.**

 **And hooray for Dust and his bros! Dust's team is interesting to be honest. I'm glad Natsume-sensei made a light novel for Dust.**

 **That's all for me, StarKnight07, signing out!**


	4. Chapter 4

"And I have arrived." After hours of walking, that is.

Even though it wouldn't take me more than half an hour at worst, I decided to see more of Axel before arriving on the guild.

It's probably because I'm that kind of people who walks around their town late at night when they're bored.

No, I'm not a burglar in my past life, don't call the fantasy world police just yet, OK? Sheesh, I did say I was trying to be a vet.

I open the door after realizing standing in front of a warm and cozy building while monologuing is stupid and not good for my health.

"Ah, finally. My body is warm again."

It's around midnight now and thus the guild is empty, save for some staffs working at their late-night shift.

Oh, Luna-san is still here.

The girl with questionable chest size is currently cleaning the pub area.

Alright, time to ask her about member recruitments.

I walk to her and coughed, "Luna-san, was it? Can I ask something?"

She stopped cleaning a desk and looked at me, "Ara, Kouta-san! Why are you at the guild late at night?"

I want to retort but she has a good point.

"I need some rounds of shots, to be honest. But more importantly, I need to ask you about member recruitments."

She nodded happily and folded a cloth she has been using to wipe the table, "I understand. Please take a seat."

The two of us sat down, and she miraculously pulled a request paper.

"First, you need to make a description about what members you want to scout. It can be anything, like for example intermediate or advanced classes only. Your party has the reliable Chris-san, who is an Archpriest, so I think everyone would love to join your team!"

So, it all boils down to using her class as a bait. I feel bad for her now.

"I-I see, can I start writing now?"

"Yes, here is the quill pen and your ink."

Talk about classy. Should I write in a classic way as well?

Thanks to my sudden knowledge about this world's language, I can write the language as well.

Let's see…

 _ **[My party is looking for more allies as we're still beginners. My ally is an Archpriest so don't worry about support spells. Looking for fellow beginners, but experienced adventurers are appreciated as well!]**_

….I'm bad at making these.

I mean, the last time I made a recruitment form was during my elementary school days!

"I-Is this good enough?"

"Y-yes, it's perfect!"

I can clearly tell you're trying to not ruin my fragile feelings right now.

"Now then, you just need to place it on the quest board, and you're set!"

…Is that it?

"That's it? No need to pay or anything?"

"Hm? There is no need to pay, Kouta-san. Are things different back from your place?"

Ah, now that I think about it…

"Nah, it's the same. Thanks for helping me, Luna-san. Care to have a drink with me?" Ahaha I'm just doing this to hide my embarrassment, what am I even doing right now.

"Oh, no, no! Guild staffs aren't allowed to drink during their work schedules, and I'm rather busy right now… sigh… come to think of it, the higher-ups warn us about the Generals…"

Generals?

"Who are they? Are they… related to the Demon King?"

Luna-san nodded while standing up, "Yes. Even though this town is located far from the reaches of Demon King's army, there is always a chance of one attacking this town. They are powerful enough to destroy towns in one single move, and they have different fighting styles."

So even though this town was made to be a "starting point", they can always attack whenever they want? Talk about harsh.

Well, it _is_ a fantasy world after all. Most of them uses this type of scenario to work.

"Then if you will excuse me, I still have lots of jobs to do."

"Ah, can I ask one more question?"

She nodded.

"Do you know a certain Archwizard called Megumin?"

Her body tensed up when I say the loli wizard's name.

"N-no, I never heard that name around here."

"You clearly did."

"No, I haven't."

Well, there's no reason to continue further about this.

Luna-san ran away to clean other dirty places and I was left alone.

Sigh.

I'm lonely.

I guess I'll order some drink.

I want to another table that is nearer to the barista.

"Hey, do you any strong drinks for me?"

The middle-aged barista nodded while cleaning a glass with a cloth.

"Yes, I do believe we have some with strong punches."

"One bottle of the very strongest, thank you very much."

He nodded and started preparing my drink. I can tell he's nervous though.

Well, whatever. I am a heavy drinker.

I-I swear I am one, me being drunk at the end of chapter 2 is just for forced joke purposes!

"Okay, now that he's busy preparing for me, time to do another recap."

First, I've pretty much memorized the town by walking for three hours straight. Of course, I have learned that the walls surrounding this town is somewhat sturdy enough to withstand attacks from monsters, and even if the walls got brought down, there are adventurers here and I'd say most of us are reincarnated Japanese people with cheat items.

Second is the Demon King, his Generals, more specifically.

Just like what Luna-san told me, the Generals are powerful enough to destroy towns in one single move. Even my new friends, Dust and his team, warns me about how crazy strong the Generals are.

If one of them came to Axel -and I'll be religious for once and start praying to prevent that from happening- it would be a sudden game over for both me and Chris.

So, I should find a way to at least make myself and Chris strong enough to defeat one of his General. The first step is done, which is recruiting new members.

Come to think of it, defeating one of them would bring me lots of fortune, right?

Although, money is not what I'm after. I'm not like those dumb main characters in visual novels I've played.

And last but not least, the Archwizard I met at the public bath not too long ago, Megumin.

If what she said is true, she's definitely a force to be reckoned with.

Her so-called "abyss staring" Explosion magic is questionable, though. Is there really something so powerful?

No, I shouldn't make unnecessary flags that can hurt me in the near future.

But still, if I do meet her again, I'll think about adding her to my party.

"H-here it is, sir. Do enjoy. W-we have a special rule about this drink however… I thought of it five times over and over, but it seems you are not the type to joke… but here it is, one bottle of Spirytus…"

I stopped thinking and looked at the bottle the barista gave me.

…What the hell?

I've heard of this devil of a drink before, hell, calling this a drink would be an understatement.

What's in front of me is a monstrosity called "Spirytus Rektyfikowany". Or what's better known as "Rectified Spirit" by the public.

It is highly concentrated ethanol which has been purified by means of repeated distillation, a process that is called rectification.

And the alcohol by volume is a whooping 95%.

Well, it is made from Ethanol, after all…

"Oi, oi, how come this abomination is legal? Are you joking with me?"

"N-no, there is only one bottle here, and this is given by someone who has now left the town to pursue the Demon King…"

Did they come from my world as well?

"Uh huh… what's the special rule?"

The barista smiled at me, still sweating bullets.

"I-If you're knocked out after one shot, it's free of charge."

I finally received a grim reminder that this world is fucked up in many more ways than one.

Although I've heard how devastating this drink is myself, hell I've seen someone dying at the local bar I used to visit back in Russia.

"Right… I'm sure one of these bad boys is not cheap, huh?"

"A-actually, the one who gave it told us he doesn't need any money… But we estimated the price to be 85.000 Eris…"

Too cheap! This is literally poison we're talking here!

"I-I see… Free of charge if I'm knocked out? Then I'll do it."

I popped the bottle open and gulped it down in one go.

"Ah…! Customer… Why would you….?"

The barista stood there, eyes wide and mouth opened due to shock.

I wiped my mouth with my hand and looked at the empty bottle, and then to the barista.

"….Heh, guess nothing can stop me after all. 85.000 Eris, you say? But is there any reward for those who could drink down this thing in one go _and_ survived?"

I mean, the bottle is still full when you brought it to me, y'know?

"T-the drink is on the house, and please, take 100.000 Eris from us."

Receiving the money, I stand up and smiled.

"Thanks for the drink, man. Appreciate it."

After placing my party request paper on the quest board, I left the guild.

Luna-san, being the nice lady she is, asked me if I'm alright after drinking such dangerous amount of alcohol.

Correction, purified Ethanol. Although alcohol is also correct but I just want to be perfectly precise about this.

Now, where were we?

Ah, yes. I'm outside the guild right now.

Playing around with the now emptied bottle, I walk under the beautiful moon. There are no clouds hanging around so the moon's brilliance shines with all its might.

Sometimes, you just need to take risks, and that's what I did.

"….Can't believe I fooled him though." I feel bad for milking 100.000 Eris from the barista.

But to be fair, I'm shocked as well myself.

The dangerous liquid that were inside the bottle, miraculously, turned out to be water.

That's right, water. Ordinary water.

I don't know if there's some divine interference or I'm just lucky. And I thought my luck was supposed to be low?

"Then again, I got the unholy title 'Emperor of dumb luck' during my… Chuuni junior high school… days…"

I stopped walking as I heard something coming from behind.

An assassin? No, I didn't do anything wrong other than teasing a certain loli goddess. Could it be a thief? I am also a thief plus I can use [Steal] if I need to.

What am I saying, [Steal] is a basic skill for thieves, Kouta you idiot!

I turned my body quickly while preparing my hands to hit whatever is behind me with my bottle.

A pair (?) of shining crimson eyes, one hidden under an eye patch and the other lit under the moonlight are staring at me intently, not even fazed because of my bottle that is ready to be thrown.

"…."

*Growl!*

"….I was hoping for a lung dragon to break into the town, but it's just you, huh?" Then again, it would be cool if lung dragons existed in this world of fantasy.

Scratch that, I think they exists here.

"….mhm."

"You hungry?"

The mysterious person nodded once again.

I sighed, "Fine. Follow me. I believe I've found an interesting restaurant."

Followed by a certain crimson eyes Archwizard, I walked to the restaurant I found rather interesting.

"…" it feels awkward with her just following me though.

But it is also midnight, I can't risk to be framed as a lolicon by walking side by side with her.

Carrying her magic staff, she slowly walked behind me.

Huh? Where is her excitement? Where's the chuuni shenanigans?

"…You seem awfully quiet."

"…There are times when I stop talking loudly. I need to save my energy."

"…I see."

I stopped walking as the two of us have arrived at the restaurant.

What makes me curious about the restaurant because it has the same sensation as restaurants back on Japan.

More precisely, it's a Japanese restaurant.

Again, this fantasy world never fails to amuse me.

"Let's get inside."

Nodding to my words, she and I went inside.

There's not much customer but the lights are still illuminating the place.

The red and orange color scheme and the beautiful ornaments really reminds me of home.

"Welcome! It's rare to get customers this late, but please take a seat!"

"Thank you."

The two of us sit, facing each other.

The waiter who greeted us came back with a menu.

"Do take a look at our oriental menu."

Ooh, I like him! …in a professional way, of course.

I'm not a homo, I swear.

Guess I'll use the 100.000 Eris I got from the poor barista.

"Anything you want to get? I'll pay, but if you order more than enough I'll run away immediately."

"A-Are you trying to pick up a fight with me?" No, not really.

"Even if I did, you look like you need to eat first. And it's not my way to hit little kids, safe for those who angered me."

"I-I'm not a kid! A-and… I haven't eaten anything for three days, so…"

Three days?! How can she even survive properly?!

"Oi, oi. Don't joke with me, _three days_? That's not good for a growing kid like you, you know? You go on quests, right?"

"…."

Whatever, I won't force her to answer.

I called the waiter and I ordered some food for me and Megumin. I can tell she can't pick one because of how weird the names are.

"Hey, Megumin. You are an Archwizard, right? I need to tell you something. Such grand class is not so easy to obtain, right? That makes it popular among the other classes, right?"

"…Mhm."

"Then why don't you belong in any party?"

"Here are your orders, sir. Is there anything more I can help with?"

Well, that was fast.

"Not for the moment, thank you."

The waiter smiled and left.

"Well… You'll see later. Your name is…"

"Minazaki Kouta. Calling me Kouta is enough."

"Right. Kouta, will you come with me after this? It won't take too long."

Oh, what is this? She sounds serious.

"Alright, let's eat before the food becomes cold."

She eats faster than a piranha after it sees your foot underwater.

Her words are probably not lies after all.

* * *

An hour after my late-night meal with Megumin.

Now with our stomachs filled with food, Megumin is the one who leads the way now.

I'm afraid about eating late at night would affect my beautiful body, but that's for another day.

It has been… roughly three hours of walking. That makes it… four in the morning now.

"Hey, you told me it won't take too much time yet we have spent three hours just by walking. Where the hell are we going? We're leaving Axel, you know."

I'm afraid we would meet monsters along the way.

"Don't worry, we're almost there. And you ordered so much food you brought them here too, right?"

She's right.

I accidentally ordered more food out of pity to the wizard in front of me, but it was too much.

The price is cheap though, not even close to 40.000 Eris.

"We're here. Kouta, it's better if you close your nose and mouth now."

Why the sudden warning?

Seeing my confused gaze, Megumin showed me a quest out of nowhere.

"This is a subjugation quest. Kill 3 Purple Haze Tortoises. The reason why there are no monsters attacking us is because of these monsters. They're all high leveled monsters, so normal beginners couldn't even scratch them and I am pretty sure they would be knocked out first by the poison anyways."

Spinning her staff, Megumin said that casually before aiming at our two o' clock.

Yes, in that direction is the Purple Haze Tortoises. They're big, probably each one of them weighs a ton. I can vaguely see smokes coming out of their shell as well.

"Those are our targets for today. After this quest, we can rest properly."

I really don't understand why I'm here.

"….So, why are we going to such a dangerous place? More importantly, why bring me here?"

"….You'll see now."

As her eye shines bright like the king crimson, she tossed her eye patch away.

"MY NAME IS MEGUMIN! ONE WHO BEARS THE TITLE OF ARCHWIZARD, THE STRONGEST FROM THE CRIMSON DEMON VILLAGE! Darkness blacker than black and darker than dark, I beseech thee, combine with my deep crimson! The time of awakening cometh! Justice, fallen upon the infallible boundary, appear now as an intangible distortion! I desire for my torrent of power a destructive force: a destructive force without equal! Return all creation to cinders and come from the abyss! [Explosion]!"

Gathering all around the night sky are colorful sparkles that seems to be brighter than the stars, they glitter and glitter, before coming into a massive black hole-like thing on top of the targeted monsters.

And then-!

*BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!*

"OH JESUS!" I desperately try to hold on to a tree near me as the sudden explosion bursts out without warning.

The explosion itself could even beat nuclear bombs in terms of sheer strength.

So, this is Explosion magic….

The air becomes hot for a while as Megumin turned around to face the horrified yet amazed me and posed.

"See that, Kouta?! Well, how do you like my Explosion?! It's great, isn't it?! I'm a genius, aren't I?! I'M TERRIFIC, RIGHT?!"

"Y-yeah, yeah… Good work, Megumin. Pulling off a single hit kill like that, you're a strong Archwizard indeed. I bet you're high leveled."

"No, I'm level 4."

"What."

Ignoring my last line, Megumin walked to me.

"Hey, Kouta."

"Hmm? What is it? I get it, you want to join my party? Can't be helped, although I feel like you're the type to pass out any moment after unleashing such world damaging magic. I mean, you made a huge crater. That is an extraordinary feat."

I said that line while standing up. Ah, great, my jeans are dirty now.

On another note, the tortoises are pretty much turned into dust thanks to the grand explosion Megumin made.

"Really, thank… you… ah,"

And she fell to the ground.

"Oi."

"I-I am the strongest, yet that forces me to pay a large amount of price…"

"How are you able to say that so calmly? Ah, never mind. You are a chuuni, after all. Of course you're fine with saying embarrassing things."

So basically, she has the strongest firepower in this town, yet she couldn't walk after using it due to exhaustion.

I knew she's nothing but trouble.

But still…

"…I did say you're a part of my party, but I'll say this once. Me and Chris will work our way up to kill the Demon King, are you sure you want to join? You are a talented loli that can rival military forces in terms of destructive power back in my country, are you really sure you want to join my beginner party? We could be nothing but a burden later on, you know."

Even though her face is kissing the ground, she scoffed.

"That bastard is nothing but a fraud. Calling himself the mightiest when we, the strong Crimson Demons are still alive, it's unacceptable! And did you just say I'm talented? I'm flattered, but please don't call me a loli."

"Sorry to be too honest. Anyways, need some help? I didn't tell Chris I'll be leaving more than two hours so she must've been worried now."

"P-please carry me."

I knew it.

This girl is gonna be a pain in the ass to handle!

* * *

" _Koronde surimuita toko, chi ga nijinde shimiru keredo…."_

"Hey, Kouta."

" _Hecchara sa! Sugu naoru kara! Ashita niwa kasabuta dekiru…"_

"What song is that? It sounds so weird because I don't understand the language you used." Said the Archwizard that is being carried on my back.

"Hmm? It's a language I used back in my birthplace. The song is about a little boy that always gets injured and is always getting teased by his colleagues, yet that only makes him more determined than before. My mother used to sing it to me and my little sister back then. Guess listening to it for seven years straight makes your memory strong." My mom was so kind of me. Until the divorce that is.

"Sister? You mean Chris?"

"….Probably."

We have reached Axel once again.

Thankfully, there were no monsters on our way back home. They are probably still knocked out due to the tortoises' poison.

"Right, you're probably tired so we'll go to my inn first."

"P-please do…"

She really turned a full 180° when she's exhausted, huh.

"….Come to think of it, you're really light huh."

"Just so you know, I have more than enough room and time to grow!"

"Oi, oi, I'm not talking about your flat bo- OUCH, OUCH, OUCH STOP IT AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!"

For a little girl, her hands are actually strong!

With my neck still in pain after Megumin almost strangled me to death, I kept on walking.

"Oh, if it isn't the reckless big brother of the new duo!" Oh great, now who is it this time?

"Hmm? Ah, Arakure-san!" It's the artisan weaver dude!

"Hah? Arakure? What's that mean?" He said, confused.

"Ah, it's a common nickname my people used for cool-looking people." Yeaaah, not really. It means rowdy in Japanese.

"I see, I see! Anyway, you need to check the guild. It's still early but people seems interested to joining your party!"

That's bullshit, but since Chris is that cute, I'll believe it.

"Gotcha. I'll go to my inn first. Thanks for the info, Arakure-san!"

Leaving the artisan weaver alone, I continue to walk again.

"Hey, Megumin. You're older than me in terms of experience, who exactly is that guy?" I'm really curious. He seems to be the type of not so important NPC that will trigger some very important Flag during late game.

"He goes to the guild during the evening to drink with other adventurers sometimes. They like getting drunk together."

"I see. Well, that's to be expected."

I think I'll find a day or two to just hang out in the guild.

Wait, does that mean I'm just continuing my NEET days?

Nah, I mean I'm socializing. That's different than being a NEET.

"Kouta, is it still far?"

"Hmm? The inn? We're already here."

Bet you guys didn't know, but I am quite confident about my speed walking. The Minazaki family is quite confident about their fit health and balanced diet, that includes me as well.

"Well, Megumin, say hello to the inn run by a gorgeous elf lady."

"Elf lady? Pfft, did you honestly think some rare race would try to earn money in Axel?"

….

Don't destroy my fantasy dreams, dammit.

Nevertheless, I went inside and immediately went upstairs.

"God, I hope Chris is okay about me coming this late…" It's still early in the morning, but you get the point.

I open the door to see Chris sitting on the bed, reading a huge book.

"Ah, Kouta-san. Good morning." said Chris as she noticed me walking inside.

"Good morning, did you get a good rest?"

"Yes. I had a little breakfast and helped the receptionist. Apparently, there's an evil spirit lurking on this floor, so she asked me to purify this place. I think I did quite a good job, and as the reward we can stay here for five more nights, free of charge!"

This floor was haunted?!

"I see, good work, Chris. Ah, anyway, say hello to our new party member."

Chris became happy seeing who i carried.

"Megumin-san! Kouta-san, this means-"

"Yeah. I've seen Explosion magic myself. Quite the devastating effects on the monsters, i should say. And thanks to her, i believe defeating the Demon King will be easier, even if it's not much. There is one thing though..."

I let Megumin sit on the long chair, but she immediately fell asleep, mumbling something about how comfy the chair is compared to the wooden chair at the guild's pub section.

"...Her stamina will be depleted after casting Explosion. The spell took a lot of mana, even beyond her capacity. Basically, a one-shot ultimate skill."

"I thank you for calling my Explosion an ultimate skill. Kouta, you can get the reward money. As long as I can release Explosion once a day and get shelter and food, i don't mind about not getting any money." She said, mumbling in her sleep.

Wow, that is kind of her.

"Alright, if you say so. Good night."

She must have been exhausted.

"Anyways, what book is that?" I'm rather curious about it.

"This book is actually a way for me to keep a record of how many people I have sent to this world."

"Like that book?"

"Yes, that book." Somehow we are on the same page.

"Then? Does the book also records their information?"

"Of course. In fact, you are here as well." said Chris as she opened another page.

As i join her to read the contents, my eyes scanned the page.

Minazaki Kouta.

That's my name, alright.

From my age, height and weight and even to my degenerate hobbies. The book records all.

Wait, degenerate hobbies?! Chris doesn't seem to mind, though.

I knew it my fetishes are acceptable by the standards of heaven!

"So since you're _that_ , you need to keep an eye of this world and thus the book automatically records it?"

Chris nodded after hearing my question, and said: "Yes. This book can also count as a divine relic, although it has no actual use in battle."

Uh huh...

"But, there is something weird from your information, Kouta-san..."

"What is it?"

She pointed at a certain section of the page.

More specifically, about my family.

"I didn't recall seeing a little girl around six years old during your family's visit to the hospital. I won't doubt the information this book gave me, but I am curious."

...

I fell silent. She has a point, though.

 _That girl_ wasn't in the hospital during my death, it's obvious.

So Chris didn't dig into my past events, huh.

Realizing my silence, Chris looked at me apologetically.

"A-ah, I'm sorry, Kouta-san... I'm sorry for asking..."

I laughed, "Don't worry about it! She's still in my brain, anyways. And if she somehow got reincarnated into this world, I wonder what kind of expression should I use."

"You're not mad?"

"Hmm? Of course not. The rule of life is that, once your fuel runs out, Death will come to you. Simple as that. But then again, this kind of thing is still too sudden for me, you know? If only she is here, then all I ask is that she lives a happier life compared to her life in Japan. If you're interested about her, then I'll tell you some stories about her. Now, enough of this sad thing! This is a fanfiction with friendship genre after all."

Why am I breaking the fourth wall while saying a not so cool line?

Well, whatever.

Wanting to change the mood, Chris noticed something long and hard poking out of my pocket.

"Kouta-san, what is that?"

"Oh yeah, you'll never guess what this is. This is the bottle that contained the dangerous liquid known as the rectified spirit, made from pure Ethanol. Although, I drank it all up. You can have the bottle though. Be careful, don't break it because it's my first achievement here."

If you thought about something else other than the empty bottle, please go to the nearest police station.

"Rectified spirit? So it's a ghost being turned into a beverage?" Chris looked at the bottle, full of interest. Seeing the unknown language on the label is making her curious I guess.

Oh yeah, I forgot spirits are actual monsters in this world.

"No. It's just a way to describe how awesome the drink is. See, it was made from this chemical substance called Ethanol. It's basically a powerful poison."

"Poison?! Kouta-san, what did you do last night?!"

"Hmm? I went around Axel to memorize the areas, went to the guild to talk with Luna-san, and then I bought the rectified spirit. Why? Oh, the poison? Chill, I'm fine. See?"

I can't tell her it was just plain water for some reason.

"If you're not feeling so well, please tell me! Really, drinking something like this... 98% alcohol?! You should have been dead right now!"

"Hey, are you angry or concerned? Anyway, we should go to the guild. I met Arakure-san on the way here, and he told me we should check the guild regarding our party member request. And I'm betting one glass of beer that you're gonna be even popular."

"Okay, then should I write a note to tell Megumin-san we're leaving for a while?"

"That would be nice."

"Wait a minute..."

Chris looked at me while tilting her head.

"...who is Arakure-san?"

And so, me and Chris went to the guild after she finished writing a note for Megumin.

* * *

...In front of the guild.

"...Yep, noisy as always. It's such a wonder how quiet the place is at the middle of the night."

The two of us went inside.

Unlike the yesterday and day before yesterday, that dude who picked up a fight with me is not present.

"Oh? Oi, Kouta! What's up man?!"

Calling me by my first name, a drunken Dust came walking towards me and Chris.

Wow, he's so drunk he reeks of beer. Not that I hate the smell, though. He just feels more of an idiot now thanks to the reddened shade on his face.

"I'm good. Came here to check on my request. The hell happened to you, Dust? Are you actually drunk from drinking one glass?"

" I-I'm not drunk! *hic!* And who's this chick? Your girlfriend?"

"Nah, meet Chris. She's my younger sister." Just like before, i winked at Chris to ask her to play along.

"My name is Chris. Thank you for taking care of my big brother, Dust-san."

After having some nice little introduction between Chris and Dust, the three of us took a seat with Dust's party. Of course, Keith and Taylor are here as well, although there is one girl who I don't recognize.

"Ah, Rin-san! So Rin-san is Dust-san's friend as well?" Hmm? Chris seems to know her though.

The girl whose name is Rin wears a green jacket with a green cape, a pair of shorts, a stocking belt and a pair of short boots.

Wait, is that a tail peeking from her shorts? Anyway, she has a pair of green eyes, and her brown hair is kept in a ponytail.

"Oh, we meet again! I believe that guy is your brother?" Rin must be referring to me.

"My name is Kouta. Minazaki Kouta. Nice to meet you."

"I'm Rin, rookie wizard." So she is a wizard, huh.

"Alright, I'll check things up with Luna-san for a little bit. And I have to tell her Megumin has killed the tortoises."

I left Chris who is chatting with Rin and the drunken Dust who seems ready to stir trouble, while Keith and Taylor holds him down.

"Ah crap, the line is long!"

True enough, there are a long line of adventurers waiting to report to Luna-san.

Despite the full line of adventurers who are bickering to each other, Luna-san impressively resolved things down one by one.

"Luna-san! There is a Rookie Killer spotted near the west side of the forest! Shouldn't the guild send a request to the capital to kill it or at least make it go away?!"

"Thank you for this information. Excuse me! Please contact the HQ immediately!"

"Luna-san! How come there is only intermediate to advanced quests today?! How can newbie adventurers like me finish those kinds of quests?!"

"I'm sorry! Please team up with other adventurers!"

…She sure has it rough, huh?

Since I'll wait just for a little longer, I take a look at the quest paper Megumin gave me.

"Defeat three Purple Haze Tortoises... What the- 700.000 Eris?! And anyway, I thought Megumin is level 4 yet the recommended level for this quest is level 30?! That girl is really a nutjob!"

But still...

700.000 Eris is definitely a huge sum of money.

I should say my thanks to Megumin later on.

Hmm, come to think about it, the first wielder of my dagger said they took a magic potion from a Crimson Demon clansman, right? I should ask Megumin more regarding that potion.

Oh yeah, come to think about it I do have a manatite from the minotaur I fought in the previous chapter. Should I give it to Megumin? Well, her explosion magic is great enough in terms of firepower but I think I'll consider giving her the manatite.

As i keep spacing out while staring at the paper I'm holding, Luna-san seems to call me.

"Next person please!"

Waking up from my trance, i then walk to Luna-san. She sure gets her job done fast.

"Good morning, Kouta-san. How may i help you today?"

"Uh, yeah... I met Megumin after I left the guild last night, and now I'm reporting to you that me and her successfully finished this subjugation quest."

"M-Megumin-san? A-anyway, it appears she has finally found yet another party."

Huh?

"Another party? Don't tell me she got rejected by the other parties around before me."

"W-well... In any case! Thank you for subjugating the tortoises, I will prepare the reward."

I sigh.

Hearing what Luna-san said earlier made me worry about my choice.

Ah, yeah I also need to ask her regarding my party member recruitment request as well.

"Here you, Kouta-san. 700.000 Eris. Is there anything more I can help you with?"

"Yeah, I need to ask about my party member request. Is there anyone interested?"

"W-well…"

"—Ah, Kouta-san, welcome back. Dust was talking about his adventures before coming to Axel and it was entertaining!"

"Y-yeah, that's good."

Back to Dust and the rest.

I sighed heavily while taking a seat near Rin who is munching a snack made of carrots.

"What's with the long sigh? Are you already tired seeing Dust's dumb drunk face?" said Rin, looking at me.

"First of all, do not talk while eating or you'll spray those ammos everywhere. And no, I'm not tired seeing Dust because this is the second time I saw him. What I'm sighing at is how no one is interested at joining my team."

"Eh?!"

"You heard me. Apparently, they're not interested because thief class is bad safe for dungeon exploring, and you all knew about the thing with me and that Swordmaster guy… ah, to think a tutorial flag gave me this predicament… at this rate we're gonna stuck with three members only…"

Me, a Thief who can't really do anything that has extremely poor RNG luck.

Chris, who is an Archpriest that has no offensive spell and is currently weak.

And lastly Megumin, an Archwizard who can only do a one hit kill before getting paralyzed.

This… is worse than I have anticipated.

"What should we do… the only one who can attack effectively is Kouta-san… I can only cast supportive spells…"

"Hmm? Chris, you don't have any spell that can be used as an offensive type?" Rin decided to speak again as she finished her snack.

"Eh? Yeah, I don't have any."

"Then, would you like to learn one of the basics?"

Seeing this as a perfect chance to learn more, I urge Chris to learn.

And so the four of us, with Keith inside the guild to watch over the drunk Dust, are outside the guild.

Me and Chris are standing side by side, while Taylor and Rin are at the opposite side of us.

"Alright, this is a pretty basic magic that can be learned for Wizard classes and Priest classes. Kouta, can you be my lab rodent?"

…Lab rodent?

"Fine, what should I do?'

"Simple, you just need to punch me as hard as you can. Come on, I'm ready."

Well, that's simple indeed.

"Don't cry afterwards! Eat this!"

I flew my fist straight towards her stomach, but then-!

"[Counter]!"

Rin's right hand quickly moved to block my fist, and I got thrown a couple meters away from her due to the impact.

"Ouch… What the hell did you just do?" I asked the girl, who continued to munch some carrot sticks.

Smirking, Rin began to explain. After she finished eating, of course.

"It's a basic magic called [Counter], where you focused your mana to one part of your body or an item that you wield. By blocking your opponent's attack with your body or item that has a certain amount of mana focused in it, you can reverse the flow of the impact back to your opponent. Although, you can also got thrown away as well if you put more mana than you needed or your opponent's attack is too strong. You need to do it just right."

I see, that's a very basic and yet important technique.

….hold on, isn't that just Gold Experience's ability?

"That's amazing! Rin-san, can I use the magic as well?" Asked Chris, not giving a damn about me who's still rubbing my ass.

"Eh? Of course, you saw me doing it right? It should be on your adventurer card by now."

"Ah, that's right! And since I'm an Archpriest I can immediately learn all the skills here!"

"Hold on. You haven't learnt any of those skills?" I asked as I stand up, patting some dust away from my pants.

Truth be told, I actually looked at Chris' adventurer card the other day when she's still sleeping.

Her race is listed as a Human and not a Goddess, which is weird. But she has a marvelous amount of skill points, 100 points. And five skills are displayed on her card back then. One of them is a strong sounding spell called "Advanced Light Barrier".

"Chris, while you're at it try getting the other five skills as well. I bet they will be handy."

"A-ah, of course. Well then… [Shining Beam], [Holy Rain], [Sacred Holy Tempest], [Miracle Burst], [Advanced Light Barrier], and then [Counter]…. And press!"

Chris' card shines brightly before it turns to normal again.

"…Now I only have 5 skill points…"

"You'll get them soon enough. Anyways, thanks for the tutorial, Rin. We'll definitely put the skill to use."

"See, Rin? I knew it you can be friendly to others as well." Taylor joked, which made the girl punched his gut.

"Ah, Chris. I need to go to the blacksmith. Do you want to join?"

The goddess of luck looked at me and said: "I think I'll go see if there's any food to buy. Megumin-san should be hungry when she wakes up."

"Alright, ah, can you get me some ingredients as well?"

"Ingredients?"

In my experience of playing RPG games, you have to craft your own healing items so that you can save up your money for the important battle later on. Hence why the crafting system is created in almost all RPG titles.

And, I'm a doctor after all. I can make a medicine or two just fine.

"Yeah, get me some herbs. Anything will do, don't force yourself to look for them if they don't have anything that can be used to make some medicine. Here's the money." I gave her some Eris, I don't think herbs would be expensive but just in case.

"Okay! I will leave now… Kouta onii-san."

As she left and I waved my hand, I quickly realized something.

"Did… did she just?"

"Hmm? Kouta, isn't it natural for her to call you that? You are her brother, after all." Said Taylor as he rubbed his stomach that got hit by Rin earlier.

"Ah, yeah. But it's… never mind, I'll go to the blacksmith now. Tell Dust to not go overboard with the drinks for me. Bye guys."

Taylor and Rin nodded at me as I left the scene as well.

But, just now… I know it's just an act, but I can't help but remember that particular moment.

The day _she_ left me before my eyes.

* * *

I open the door and walked inside.

"Hey, old man! I came to visit!"

"Oh? Why isn't it the rookie thief!"

"Call me Kouta. Anyways, you got what I send through the guild, right?"

Old man Smith laughed heartily, "Sure did, lass! What a rare material they are! Say, where did you get those beautiful babies?"

I picked a short sword as I speak, "Got it after beating a minotaur. It was a hard battle, but I won." Thanks to Chris' magic spell, that is.

"Quite the strong one, aren't ya?! Well tell you what, how about you sell them to me? I'll pay a good amount of cash. How does that sound?"

Hmm… sounds promising.

"Nah, I'll pass the offer for now. There's something I want you to help me with, though."

"Oh? I'm all ears."

"I feel like there's a way to combine the sword and axe to one. I noticed that there's a gap on the axe that's the exact size as the sword's grip. Might be wrong, but I want you to try to combine it."

"Hmm... what an odd request... I like it! I'll see if I can do that tomorrow. Is there anything you want again?"

I smile as I give him the short sword i picked up, "Make this guy sharper, at least sharp enough to cut strong vines. I think it's already sharp as it is currently but I can tell it might break if I use it too much."

"That would be 20.000 Eris. Aren't you a thief? What good is a short sword for?"

True, if you look at the class system thieves doesn't need swords.

I joked, "I want to test something out is all."

"You got it kiddo."

I watch Old man Smith as he sharpened up the sword.

"Say, kid. Where did you came from exactly? I've never seen your face and your lil sister around here."

"Please, call me Minazaki. And both of us came from a distant place from here. It's somewhat boring there so we decided to be adventurers."

"Hmm." He hummed as he polished the now sharpened sword.

"That sister of yours, I can't help but feel like I've seen her somewhere."

"Really?"

"Yep. Her silver hair reminds me of Eris-sama."

...uh oh.

"O-oh? Well, people in my place back then used to call her the splitting image of Eris-sama, so I guess it's just a coincidence..." WHAT AM I DOING RIGHT NOW?!

"Ho ho. Some say that Eris-sama is not what she seemed to be. Although, most of them are just talking a buncha different crap here and there."

Hmm?

"Not what she seemed to be?"

"There is this one figure that loved to visit this place, around ten years ago. He said something about her name. I didn't care much as I worshipped her, so I just waved the rumors off."

Her name?

Eris...

"I see. Well, it's not like I'll worship any Goddesses or anything. Thanks for the sword, old man. Here's the payment."

With a new sword in my possession, I decided to end the day early and go back to the inn.

"But still..."

Old man Smith's words kept lingering inside my head. What the hell am I missing here? I tried racking my brain for some clues, but i just couldn't find any logical explanation.

"Dammit, I'll think about it later."

As i walk around the city of Axel and not walking straight to the inn, I noticed someone selling something familiar that I used to see in Japan.

"Huh, I guess people also sell cigarrettes here as well." Probably someone from my world invented it here. I hope they don't get lung cancer around here. That would be bad for adventurers. Well, for any people really.

I walk to the man, some people are sitting beside him as well while smoking.

Bad smokers, though. Couldn't even smoke properly, what an idiot.

"Hey, what is this you're selling?" I'll just act dumb for now.

"Oh, just some plain old cigarettes, care to buy a pack?"

Wow, straight to the point.

I took a pack from the counter. Even though it looks simple, the box seems sturdy enough so that the quality of the cigarettes inside is protected and it appears it is evenly sealed as well so that there would be no air going inside, which prevents the tobacco turning to crap. It has 20 cigarettes in it, pretty basic.

"You can pop one out and try first before you buy it." Said the seller, giving me some sort of lighter. It's harsh on the edges but you can tell it's a fine lighter with decent quality.

"Hm." I'm not a smoker myself, but considering I'm in another world…

Without further ado, I open the seal and open the lid, then I pulled one out.

"…Shit, the filter's too long…" although the tobacco, unexpectedly, looks fine and smells good.

Holding the cylinder with my mouth, I light it up with the lighter.

"…This is actually nice."

If any of you have experience in smoking (and smoking is bad for you, smoke at your own risk!), you might have seen Marlboro Smooth from America, and I tell you what this thing I'm enjoying right now is the splitting image of it. You can feel the not so strong but still noticeable menthol taste of it, and it burns up quite nicely, not too fast and not too short.

"Still, the filter is long, why is that?"

Grinning at my question (which was directed at myself), the seller began to speak.

"Well, inside the filter is a ball I made out of menthol herbs, pop it with your teeth or fingers and a whole 'nother level."

Ah, then this means…

I bit the filter until there's a soft "pop!" sound, and I inhaled the lung cancer goodness once again.

"…Hey, this is like the Ice Blast I used to get!"

Another familiar taste I'm getting here, everyone. Marlboro Ice Blast. I used to get these from a friend.

"So, what do you think? Pretty fine taste, isn't it? One pack is for 1.200 Eris only."

1.200 Eris? That's like… three times the price of cigarette packs in Japan.

Fucking capitalist.

"Alright, I'll get two." I give the man 2.400 Eris and said my thanks.

But then…

"….[Steal]." My left hand glowed in a faint while color, not bright enough for the man and the other villagers to notice.

"Just like what that gang-star said: 'You shouldn't ever low your guard down in this town'. Thanks for the lighter."

Lighting another cigarette, I finally decided to go home for real this time.

* * *

As Kouta walked to the inn, Chris -Eris in disguise- is still on the shopping district. She did mention to her "brother" that she wanted to find some food just in case Megumin, their new Archwizard ally, is hungry after she woke up.

She had asked for directions from the villagers and they are kind enough to show her the way, one of them -a middle-aged woman- even made a little but detailed map of the town for her.

And so, she's now walking with interested eyes in the shopping district.

"Let's see…. First off, I need to get some food…. Megumin-san is still on her teenager years, so I should buy her a balanced meal! And for Kouta onii-san-"

Suddenly, she stopped herself from taking another step.

It has been three days since their meeting. A meeting between the Goddess of Luck -Eris- and a normal teenager that got killed in a pretty ridiculous way -Minazaki Kouta-.

Although, if one were to think about it, he's not exactly "normal".

His over the top red jacket has lots of pockets, both outside and inside. And yet people wouldn't notice the items that he brings all the time, namely his so called first-aid kit (even though it was just some bandages and antiseptics). His black jeans also have lots of pockets as well (and judging from his jacket, he should have some items in them as well, although Eris is not sure about that.). From Eris' perspective, Minazaki Kouta is a person that seems to be always prepared for any situation. A good candidate for a hero that will kill the Demon Lord that has been threatening her people.

His character, though? No hero material at all.

His words are so crude sometimes even Eris wanted to snap in public, and he even teases her chest! His manners are questionable, scoffing at other adventurer (read: Mitsurugi Kyoya) that's stronger than him, and he even stares at the Guild employee -namely Luna-'s chest whenever he has the chance to do so! And judging from what she has read about him from her all-seeing book, he had done many -but not countless- mistakes in his previous life. The Goddess of Luck can do nothing but feel worried about what might happen in the future when he does something outrageous.

It has been three days, and yet Eris could feel Minazaki Kouta's influence spreading on her. Not in a bad way, of course.

In fact, it is a refreshing experience for her. Sure, her Senpai -the Goddess of Water, Aqua- is always bullying her, but Minazaki Kouta gives a different vibe. While his words are harsh whenever he's angry or pissed off, Eris could tell whether he means it or not. He's simply a paragraph that's too easy to read.

Or is he?

Chris smiles to herself after noticing a stall that sells an authentic food (judging from its name on the stall), and from the smell of it the girl is sure Megumin would love some of it.

"Excuse me! Can I have three of this, please?"

"Sure thing, missy!"

She giggled as the man prepared the dish in front of her eyes. She wondered what comment Kouta will give to the dish that is being prepared in front of her.

"Hmm… ah, right! I should get some herbs as well."

Kouta had requested her to get some herbs, ingredients for making a medicine.

She doesn't get it, though. He already has his first aid kit, and she's an _Archpriest_. Their party has more than enough "healers" to begin with.

Could it be?

'Is It because I'm still in my weakened state?' is the girl's thought.

Gods in general relies on their followers' faith, that rule applies to Eris as well.

But after being pulled into the mortal world by the one who is currently her "big brother", she seemed to lose most of her strength.

Archpriest is one of the most powerful class, and is an important role both in small battle and in an all-out war. A class that can use various types of magic and blessing, both offensive and defensive.

The man might be thinking about her own health as well, what if Eris couldn't do her task properly after casting spells repeatedly?

Such a thought never crossed her mind.

But he did think about the scenario. If her assumption is correct, that is.

Well, let's just say her assumption is correct.

"Sorry for the wait! These will be 4.500 Eris." Quite pricy, but the girl paid no mind and give the man the money.

With a smile and a bow, she thanked him and walked away from the stall to find some other food that might please Megumin's appetite. And some herbs too.

'I need to hurry. Megumin-san might wake up sooner than I expected.'

With a nod, she checked on the other stores within the shopping district.

Whether it was a façade or the truth, Goddess of Luck Eris will always do her best, if it's for a good cause of course.

And for the sake of defeating the Demon king, maybe she'll have some fun with this surprising role. It's not like she dislikes the idea of becoming one's younger sibling, even though she doesn't have any reason to be one considering she's an immortal being.

Sooner or later, she'll come back to the heavens after completing this troublesome quest.

* * *

 **Ahhhh it's been awhile! Thank you so much for waiting so patiently. I deeply appreciate everyone that follows this story, I really do! Shout out to my friends irl that actually gives me encouragement (yes, even I'm able to feel down as well, but let's not go there) as I struggle through my work. Of course, I'm still an amateur when it comes to writing stories, so any review and critics would be a huge help! See you on the next update everyone!**


	5. Chapter 5

" _Konna repurika wa iranai~ honmono to yoberu mono dake de ii~ sagashi ni yukunda soko e~~ demo sore wa yoku dekita fearii teiru mitai…."_

Singing a familiar song about a series that revolves around teenage melodramas, I rested my body on a green sofa. It's pretty comfy.

Not to mention this room has some snacks like salted peanuts, and newspapers too.

If you guys are wondering, I'm chilling at the smoking room.

I got scolded by the Elf(?) lady when I came inside with a lit cigarette in my hand, so she told me I can smoke here instead.

Well, that's a mistake on my part.

Still…

"I should have looked for Chris instead of coming back here immediately." It worries me.

Sure, it's just your normal little shopping, but she seems like the type that never gives up. What if she kept on looking for the herbs I asked her to get?

"I'll properly thank her later. Now then-" as I put the freshly lit cigarette between my teeth, I picked up the newspaper on the table.

Let's see…

Belzerg Hours? What a dumb name for a newspaper. Nice font, though. A solid 9 out of 10.

"…more doubts aimed towards the kingdom, huh?" must be hard for them.

The Kingdom of Belzerg, is apparently the only kingdom that overlaps with the Demon king's territory. So they relied on their defenses most of the time.

Or so I've read in the newspaper.

"The fact that this kingdom, _phew_ , plays on defense most of the time proves that the overlord is too much to handle huh?"

Tapping my cigarette on the ashtray, I throw some salted peanuts up to the air, aiming my mouth.

As I keep munching peanuts, I flipped the paper until I reached the one with the continued topic regarding the kingdom's problem.

"….His Majesty and the prince are also joining in the frontlines, eh? Brave of them to do that. History records have never told me about these noble acts." Unless you count the legends of King Arthur and other myths, that is.

"The only thing I can think of is… hmm… man, making strategies sure is hard. How did those guys make guide for games so easily?" well, probably because _this_ is not a game.

If I were to be in the frontlines, huh.

I'd rather do the hit-and-run tactic. The stronger the better. I'd say gather more than fifteen adventurers that can use offensive spells and hit the Demons head-on with first-class magic, and let the knights clean up the mess.

By theory, it sounds too basic, but that's the only thing I can think of right now.

Ah, the knights probably know how to do some archery too. So that could be a big help for them as well.

Still, we're talking about demons. Evil beings that wants to bring doom and destruction. Savages if you will.

"….Fight fire with fire. Meaning, magical forces for magical forces as well."

I doubt they will win in the near future, though.

Dying off the cigarette in my hand before it burns my fingers, I put the cigarette butt in the ashtray.

It was two in the afternoon, time goes by when you found something that you were addicted to, huh.

Although, I know the cigarettes I've been smoking currently doesn't have any dangerous things like nicotine and the such. Just 100% tobacco, so it won't cause anything that bad.

Such was a lie I told myself.

"Kouta-san, are you he- *cough!* *cough!*… W-what's with the smoke?!"

"Hey, don't stand there. Either you go in and close the door or you close the door and immediately go to our room."

She went inside and closed the door immediately.

"K-K-Kouta-san! What is the meaning of this?!"

"What? I'm reading the newspaper. Oh, yeah, try these nuts. They're great."

...the salted peanuts, okay? Not the other kind.

"What I'm mad about is this smoke! What smell is this?!"

"Hey, I took a bath properly and I'm very self-aware when it comes to hygiene. If it's the smoke you're talking about… promise you won't be mad at me?" I feel like she's gonna snap at any second.

"I'm already mad, though…"

"Well, I've been smoking," I said as I eat a couple of peanuts.

"Smoking?! Isn't that what delinquents do?!"

"Hey, you've been reading too much manga from your Senpai, huh? By the way, this world's cigarette is not dangerous since there are no manmade chemicals involved. Trust me."

Such was a lie I told her.

But at least Chris is relieved now.

"I see… but, don't smoke too much just in case."

"Yeah, yeah. Anyway, you brought some food for Megumin and my ingredients?"

Chris nodded happily, "Yes! And I believe you will like the food as well."

"Well, what are we waiting for then?"

And so, both of us went to our room.

I can feel Chris' worried glance from my back, and I sighed.

"…I promise I won't smoke more than four cigarettes per month, happy?"

She didn't reply, but I felt her warm smile.

Seriously, I'm going to die from her awkwardness before even trying to defeat one of the Generals.

In any case, the two of us went inside our room.

"Ah, Kouta and Chris, welcome back."

Sitting on the long chair is Megumin, who was cleaning her magic staff before greeting us.

"We're back. Chris bought us food. I need to go to the bathroom first." I said as I removed my jacket, casually dropping it onto the bed.

The bathroom is decent, to say the least.

It has warm and cold water, and there are a shower and a bathtub as well.

Although, I would rather go to the public bath after a tiring quest.

Looking at my reflection show on the mirror, I fixed my hair.

"Come to think of it, I never cut my hair since a month ago." My hair is not that long, but it almost reached my neck.

I washed my face with the flowing, cool water. Turning off the tab, I wipe my face dry with the towel hanging near the wash basin.

As I went into the main room again, I saw Chris and Megumin sitting on the carpeted floor, already eating without me.

"Wow, seeing you guys eating like that saddens me. Though, I'm fine with it." I said as I joined them.

In front of us are five dishes, with three same dishes and two different ones.

"Where did you get these, Chris?"

"Oh, I bought them from the shopping district." Of course you did.

The three of us are eating what it appears to be Chinese fried rice. The rich taste that balances well with the rice dances in my tongue perfectly. It makes me feel I'm in Hong Kong.

"And the shrimp, too. The sauce blends well." I said as I grabbed one of the shrimps with my chopstick. The mix of sweet, sour and spicy flavors made you want to eat more.

"I'm glad you liked it. How about you, Megumin-san? Is the rice good for your taste buds?"

The loli in question nodded. "They tasted great, well it's probably because I haven't tried the foods from the market." She said, picking tofu from the last dish; which looks (and tastes) similarly like Mapo Tofu.

Goddamn, that priest is here as well apparently.

"By the way, Kouta. About your jacket. Why does it have so many pockets?" Megumin asked, food coming out from her mouth.

"Hey, what's with lolis in this world and bad manners? Chew your food properly, dammit! But, to answer your question, I like my pockets just like I love my cats; I want a huge amount of them."

"Come to think of it. Kouta-san, what are you bringing inside all those pockets?" Chris added another question.

"Hmm… let's see." I stand up and picked my jacket, and brought it to the girls.

My red jacket, just like what Chris and Megumin noticed, has a lot of pockets. I'm a walking zipper if you will.

No, not that guy.

There is a pocket in each of my jacket's sleeves. And there are six main pockets. So, there are eight pockets in total.

I open one of them.

"I usually carry some items that could help whenever someone is injured, like band-aids and disinfectants. But if I recall correctly… there it is, my ID card."

I showed the girls my ID card, protected by a sturdy case.

"Why would you need something like that?"

"Megumin, in my place there is this thing called the age of consent. Because my face looks like a dumb 17-year-old I need to show my ID so that people know I'm above the age of consent for the good stuff. Wait, Chris why are you looking at me like that?"

"E-excuse me, then. What is inside the other pockets?"

I hummed, opening another pocket.

"….It's a pen. And a little note to go along with it."

"Why would you bring them? And wow, this is the first time I saw a pen like that." Megumin noted as she ate another shrimp.

"…Well, you never know. The world is a scary place. We should finish our lunch, I believe we need to take another quest. Megumin, can you use Explosion again?"

She shook her head, "Sorry. But my limit is one explosion per day."

"Then that's fine, at least you can move now. I believe I saw a good quest when I submitted our report."

Chris and Megumin looked at each other, confused, and continued eating lunch.

I looked at a certain pocket within my jeans, thank the heavens they didn't ask about what the thing is.

* * *

And so, we're back at the guild.

Dust and his team aren't here, I guess they went back to their inn?

I looked at the quest board with Megumin and Chris, searching for the quest I was talking about.

"…Ah, there it is." I smiled, taking the quest paper from the board.

"Hmm? Wild Boar Hunting?"

Yes. Boars do exist in this fantasy world. As it is written on the paper, we need to hunt ten medium-sized boars, or two big ones. The reward is quite pretty and we can get a fair share of the meat for ourselves.

"I can hunt these boars easily, I've dealt with them before."

Chris looked at me questionably, "Really?"

I nodded.

True, I did hunt a boar or two back in my world.

"Kouta, shouldn't we hunt them during daylight?"

"Are you nuts?! I'm not gonna risk my life just like what I did when me and Chris slew that Minos."

I walk to the receptionist section, namely to Luna-san, but turned my head so that I can see my teammates.

"But, don't worry. I have a plan within my pocket."

"Next!" Oh, that's my queue.

"Hey, Luna-san." I greeted the guild receptionist.

"Ara, Kouta-san. Do you want to take a quest?"

"Pretty much. I want you to confirm this quest. Three people; me, Chris and Megumin."

"Certainly."

"Ah, Luna-san, if I may ask… in the quest paper it stated that we only need to hunt two big boars, or ten of the medium-sized ones. Is there an extra payment if we got more?"

"Don't worry. The quest giver will appreciate your hard work just by hunting ten of them. You are ready to go! Have a safe adventuring, Kouta-san."

Uh… huh?

"Oh yeah, before I go. Are there any tips?"

Luna-san smiled at me before saying: "Take the hunt easy. They are a little pushy during these times."

I nodded and walk to Chris and Megumin.

"We've got the approval. But since it's still three in the afternoon, let's go to the inn first. I forgot something."

"Kouta-san?"

"I forgot to make some medicines… and poisons."

"Kouta, you know how to make them?"

"What? Does it take a genius alchemist with a metal arm to make poison around here?"

"Uh, no, but I didn't think you're the type to make those."

As I walk slightly ahead of them, I hummed while grabbing the little note and pen from my jacket's pocket.

"Let's see…" I scribbled some items that I needed. The herbs that Chris bought is a great help since I can make a few antidotes with them, I could tell by the smells from the herbs after all.

"…I think the list is complete. Hey, Chris, Megumin."

"What is it, Kouta-san?"

"I need some help…"

* * *

The Goddess of Luck and Fortune was confused.

It was not because of his complicated list of items, but it was simply because she didn't understand why he needed things like these.

Like, raincoat? During _summer_?

"Chris, Kouta is really the shopaholic huh?"

Ah yes, the Archwizard was walking alongside her as well.

"Y-yes, yes he is."

She wasn't sure how to answer Megumin's question. She barely knew him after all.

"Chris, you are Kouta's sister, right?"

"Eh? A-ah, yes. Step-sister, actually"

"I've been wondering."

They walked side by side at the shopping district, and their conversation died due to the noise from the crowd.

"Wondering?"

The wizard nodded, "He seems to be the protective type, isn't he?"

"Eh?"

"It's rude but, I've read your book. Was it your book? The big one."

Chris gulped, and nodded. She forgot about the book!

"You sure have a lot of information, Chris. You're smart, I can tell."

From the wizard's tone, it appears Chris' secret identity is still safe.

Maybe she can bluff her way out!

"I'm still miles behind my brother." Said the Goddess in disguise, smiling to herself.

Well, she did read Kouta's backstory, might as well bring that up as an easy way to escape more unnecessary questions.

"Huh, from the looks of it you're smarter than him."

"Am I? Perhaps I am…"

They went inside a shop that Kouta had told them to visit, Chris recalled he said something that he took sightseeing for himself around the town.

"Welcome!"

The one greeted the two girls, behind the counter, was a middle-aged woman. A flashy bandana on her head.

"What can I get you kids today?"

Chris sweatdropped, she does look like a kid…

"We're trying to get some items for our next quest." Chris said, giving the woman the paper full of items Kouta needed.

"Let's see… raincoats?"

"We think it is necessary."

"And spikes?"

"W-we need to set out some traps…"

"Wooden spears?"

"O-one of our teammates loves spears…"

"Well, might as well call them a fanatic, ordering forty of them… but at least asking for a large picnic cloth sounds humane..."

The woman mumbled under her breath, still smiling.

"Wait here, okay? I'll get them for you."

And so Megumin and Chris waited, sitting on one of the tables provided.

"Hey, Chris. Seriously, Kouta is your brother, right?"

" _step-_ older brother, actually."

"Ah, right, right. You guys don't look alike, so I guess it makes sense if you two are not blood-related. I mean, for one thing, you don't have the boring looking eyes he has."

Chris' lavender-blue eyes blinked, "I-I see. Although, he has helped me a lot."

"Like when you two were fighting the minotaur?"

Chris nodded.

Back then, it wasn't a flashy fight, but the tension was noticeable.

They only had each other, both of them being inexperienced adventurers. Well, they still are.

Her limited strength, Kouta's rushed out attacks. Both of them could have died at that point.

She winced in pain when the Minos' weapon struck Kouta's shoulder, as blood sprayed everywhere. Chris wasn't sure whether it was her luck or his abysmal luck that brought victory.

"I had a hard time healing Kouta-san at that time, but at the very least he went back up again as if nothing happened. He did complain sometimes though."

"Heee…. Then, what did you guys find? Any treasures?"

"Sadly, no. I am still happy that we came back safely, but we did find a Manatite crystal."

The two of them casually talked about various stuff. From Megumin's daily explosion regime to Chris' wonders (although, she played an act for this one) about the world.

Not long after, the woman came back, carrying the items Chris had requested.

"Here you go! But I'm not sure if you two can carry them, I can ask my son to bring them with you."

"A-a-ah no need to worry! We'll handle it somehow!"

Chris gave the woman the right amount of money for the items, but she knew she wasn't strong enough to carry the wooden spears, and Megumin couldn't carry heavy stuff as well if she looked at her physical figure.

"Are you two sure about this?"

"W-well…"

"Let me carry them."

The ladies turned towards the door, and standing right there was the one who had requested all these items.

* * *

"Ahh sorry, Chris, Megumin. I kinda went overboard with the list, huh?" I said, approaching them.

"Oh, I haven't seen your face around here. Actually, I've never seen you as well." The woman from the counter noted as she looked at me and Chris.

"My name is Minazaki Kouta, and this is my younger sister Chris. We're basically new here."

"Minazaki Kouta? Ahh, you're the one that embarrassed Mitsurugi-san in public a few days ago, right?"

"Ouch, rumors spread like influenza around here eh?"

"Hahaha, you are bold to challenge him. Might as well knock some sense to his ego."

"You said it."

That wasn't me by the way, it was Chris.

"Anyways, thanks for your patronage. Come back soon!"

Carrying the heavy spears that are now on my back, the three of us left the shop.

"Kouta-san, what exactly are you trying to do with the spears?"

"Mhm, you'll see. It revolves around digging holes, and also poisonous spears."

Chris and Megumin didn't say anything until we reached the place instructed on the quest paper.

"So, this is the place." Megumin looked around as she gripped her staff.

We're currently standing on a wide, vacant place located in the middle of the forest.

The breeze rustles the trees, giving us a nice feeling.

"Seems like it. Megumin, help me dig a hole or two." I said, passing her a shovel.

"U-um… Kouta-san, isn't this a job for handsome males like you?"

"Hitting on me won't work unless you really mean it, dumbass."

She pouted, but started to dig anyways.

What I have in mind is the Burmese Tiger Trap.

If you guys are unfamiliar with the trap, it's basically a trap that required a pit that's either deep enough and wide enough, or a standard depth of pit with shit tons of stakes.

It's better if you used bamboo stakes, but wooden spears are all I could find in this world with reasonable price.

"Kouta-san, what should I do?"

"Ah, grab some of the bottles on the little bag over there. Don't open them, though. Don't want to get yourself knocked up."

I look at her, on her hand is four small bottles, the blue liquid inside them.

"Are these the bottles?"

"Yeah, don't ever open them up, we need them to attract the boars here."

One hour and thirty minutes had passed, and Megumin and I had finished digging up the holes.

"T-t-this is slavery, Kouta! To think you'd force me to put the spears as well! You're the demon lord, aren't you?! Scratch that, I think the guy is better now compared to you!"

"Oh, shut up. I don't like making this kind of pit either. Also, slavery? Please. Slavery means you'd do all the job and me and Chris will just slack around and will give you punishment if you don't work hard."

Her complaints aside, we've set up four large pits that could be able to kill three to four boars per hole. I checked the quality of the spears beforehand, so those wouldn't be an issue.

"Okay. Chris, give me the bottles."

"Ah, yes!"

I received the bottles from her.

It was such a pain to make these bad boys within a small period of time. But I did it regardless. Man, I'm so smart I'm practically Cagliostro now.

"This better work…" I open the bottles one by one and poured their contents evenly to the pits, one bottle for one hole.

The liquid moved down in a slimy manner on the spears, making them shine due to the sun.

Well, the sun was almost changing places with the moon, but whatever.

"Kouta, what are those substances anyway?"

"Those are poison."

"Poison?"

I nodded and start explaining to them, "In my workplace, there's a certain method where you put your patients to sleep before you did the surgery. The substance I just poured was kinda similar but more… unique, in a sense. You must measure their dosage right, or else the poison would be too dangerous. For a normal human, one drop of the liquid will knock their senses out in a flash. But since this is boars we're dealing with, it should be fine if we raised the dosage."

"So, what will happen to the boars?"

"Easy, Chris. Once they fall into our trap, the spears will pierce their body with the help of their own weight and gravity. The poison will slowly spread through their body, numbing their system. They couldn't move after that of course, and that's the time you're gonna shine. Chris, do you have any skill that clears negative effects like paralysis?"

Hearing my question, she took out her card.

"Umm…. Yes, the [Holy Rain]. With it I can clear negative effects from anything that I want- Wait, you mean?"

I nodded and smiled triumphantly, "Yeah. We kill them first, then you will clean the poison from them. Pretty easy, right?"

"It is but..."

As if she was able to read Chris' thoughts, Megumin started to speak. "Where should we wait?"

"Go over there and set the picnic cloth or whatever the thing's called. Just make yourselves comfortable. I need to check if there's anything else than the boars."

Here's a (not so reliable) tip: always bring your go-to weapon on a place that you can easily grab.

As I walked through the calming forest, the dagger case on my leg let out jingle sounds as I borrowed (read: stole) a chain from someone.

"Hmm... did I brought my phone by the time I died?"

Opening the pocket on my jeans that was always used to store my smartphone, I tried to grab whatever is inside.

"Ah, I did bring it!"

I swear to god this is still a "Konosuba" fanfiction and not an "In another world with a smartphone" fanfic.

Anyways, going back to my smartphone...

Since it was protected by a sturdy cover, I couldn't see any damage to the thing.

"Well, I won't bother to turn it on, though. Not like there's a connection in another world anyway. Plus, this is (probably) during the Roman era, do they used smartphones? No, of course not." I can probably take pictures of this world.

I clicked my tongue upon realizing how I'm basically trapped in this whole demon lord business.

A dumb loli wizard, and a weakened goddess that can't do much. What's next, a female knight that has issues with her BDSM tendencies?

"I mean I'm fine with a femdom knight, might as well spice up my life to level twenty." I shouldn't go that far, actually.

"Let's see... a few more time before sunset."

I put my cigarette between my teeth before lighting it up with my lighter.

"...Why do I feel like this will be a long day..."

My eyes were fixed towards the retreating sun, the orange light lengthened my shadow behind me.

"Ah you guys are already comfortable, I see."

"Welcome back, Kouta-san."

It was a hassle to find these two, as they set our "base" a couple of meters away from the traps.

"You guys picked a reasonable distance. This way I can snipe other creatures if I have to."

"Kouta, I thought you're a Thief? [Snipe] only works for Archer, right?"

"That's true, but don't underestimate my eyesight."

"Come to think of it, do you guys bring food or something?"

"Ah,"

"N-no, sorry..."

"Well that's fine. I can manage but what about you two? But I knew something like this would happen so..."

I pulled two food bars that tasted like those energy bars you would find on a convenience store, and two bottles of water from a bag that I've been carrying. I figured my pockets won't work too nicely with food so I bought myself a little bag before meeting Chris and Megumin at one of the shops.

"Here, the bar will keep you two full for the whole night." It's quite the dick move from me, but energy bars in this world are quite alright.

"Hmm... I sensed something weird about this forest. Chris, can you tell me if something's off?"

Chris nodded, "Yes. I'll inform you immediately."

This is our second quest after the whole reincarnation business, so I don't think anything bad would happen to us this early at the stage. But knowing my luck...

"Megumin, can you cast [Explosion]?"

"I still don't have the energy..."

"Uh huh."

In strategy games, when your party has a member that's severely lacking in their stats, you need to try to at least guard their backs. And I'm trying to do the same here.

She's an Archwizard, but my guts are telling me she's as useful as a kid at this stage.

Voices of footsteps could be heard from our 11 o' clock, around a hundred meters away. I could tell because the forest is silent, and Chris looked tense too.

"Well, we might be able to go home tonight after all." I said, climbing up to a big tree.

"Kouta-san?"

"I'm trying to listen to the voice. Higher heights equals to better reception." A theory proposed by me and is approved by me.

! What is this...

"They're not boars." Chris said with a grim expression on her face.

"...Chris, back me up!" I shouted, jumping from branches to branches.

As I hopped around skillfully, the footsteps became much clearer to my ears.

"...Goblins?"

What the hell StarKnight07, this isn't a Goblin Slayer fanfiction.

Well, goblins are fine since it's an RPG staple but you know what I mean.

I silently draw an arrow from its place, and placing it on my bow.

My eyes, aimed towards one of them, lets me shoot the arrow with excellent precision.

The arrow glides through the evening wind, straight at one of the beasts' head.

"That will give them a warning."

I then shoot out a few of them down again.

One by one, their allies fall. This made the others lucky enough to not get hit screech in anger, trying to look out for their hunter.

Well goblins are dumb, so I wouldn't be concerned.

But then I remember what Goblin Slayer had taught me, so a little bit precaution should be necessary.

"Kouta-san! Are you-"

"Hush! Keep your voice low," I took a glance at the remaining goblins. There are 14 left of them "Chris, cast yourself and Megumin protective spells. This is weird, very weird. Why would goblins be... Oh dammit, this is ON!"

These bastards stole my targets!

Grabbing my dagger, I jumped from the branch I was standing on, landing on a goblin's head, crushing it instantly.

The sticky red liquid sprayed on to my jeans and to my shoes as I start the inevitable slaughter.

"COME AT ME YOU RABID DOGS!"

Dagger in hand, and my sword in the other, I begin the hunt under the mistress of the night.

Their wooden clubs broke in half thanks to the refined sword of mine, making them unable to defend nor counterattack.

I slashed one of them and purposely let its blood burst out of its chest, spraying on its friends' eyes.

"Is that all you got?!" I asked, kicking them hard into the ground before stabbing another with my dagger.

"Oh no... Kouta went sicko mode!"

"S-sicko mode? Is that bad, Megumin-san?"

"ONE MORE OF YOU!" I hit the abomination's head with my sword's tilt, before stabbing its head downwards with my short partner.

"ha... ha... ha... I think I went another level thanks to that" on another note, my clothes now reek of goblin shit.

"So Kouta, what should we do?"

Still catching my breath, I put my dagger to its case, "let's search for the boars first. At least, the remains of them. That way we can tell to Luna-san we already took care of it."

"But isn't that cheating?"

"Bringing you alone is a cheat, Chris." I joked lightly before walking to where the goblins emerged from.

"What does that mean, Chris?"

"I-I don't know, let's follow him, Megumin-san."

I put my hand on the back of my neck, thinking about our next goal.

Boars are a thing, but goblins? They are basically low-tier demons, the slaves of demons and wicked witches alike in legends, myths and games.

Knowing this, could it mean there is someone _or_ something connected to the Demon Lord? In this town that's far away from his reach?

"I have a bad, bad feeling for this..."

* * *

"And in the end, we wasted our funds with the items."

"We still have our raincoat, Kouta-san. Please cheer up."

I sighed, letting the warmth of the water to take away my stress off my shoulders.

After doing another time skip, we are now currently at the local hot springs.

Of course, the wall that divided me and my two female teammates let us converse with ease.

"But still, it was a waste of Eris, ya know? and we didn't even find any single thing left from the boars. Curse those goblins, stealing our dinner like that."

"But weren't you trying to kill them via poison?"

"My dear Archwizard friend, there's a reason why I brought Chris along" I did say she would use her spell to remove the poison from the boars, but here we are.

"I'll visit the guild after this. You two can go to the inn and rest. I feel like I want to do some party scouting as well too so I'll be gone for a while."

"I-I'll come!"

"Why? You need to rest, knowing your condition and all."

"Condition?"

"A-ah, it's nothing important, Megumin-san."

I sighed, at this point you will blow your own cover, you know?

Then again, a God is bound to not be able to lie properly.

"Well, if you won't shut up about it, I guess I'll let you taste the nightly hours. How about you, Megumin?"

"I'll pass. I still want to take a long nap."

"Well I would force you to go home even if you wanted to come along."

After our brief exchange of lines, I decided to wash my face with the warm water.

Hot springs is truly a blessing given out by Mother Earth.

'But still... I wonder what should I do from now.'

First of all, for a second quest tonight have been a bad experience from the start.

We wasted our funds on those spears and I took my sweet time and energy to change those herbs into poisons.

I'm not the best guy on the field, so my hands are rusty _and also_ inexperienced.

'Not to mentioned those goblins. When and where did they come from?'

I would sleep over the fact that goblins are dumb creatures, but their sudden entrance could turn into one fine catastrophe. And I'm not talking about them stealing everyone's money or stupid rape sessions like what you would see from _doujinshis_ or _eroges_.

I'm talking about actual catastrophes that will cause innocent lives being lost.

'Well, I'm not trying to be the legendary hero so to hell with that thought, mister brain.'

If I said that out loud, Chris probably would kill me.

But then again...

"...I am a nuisance of a human, after all."

I escaped the warm embrace of the water and grabbed my towel, wrapping it around my lower half.

Water dripping off from the edge of my hair slowly yet smoothly moved towards my face, touching my lips silently.

"Well, let's dry up for the time being."

As I exited the male's bathing area, now wearing my shorts and my shirt since they didn't get smothered by goblin mess, there's no one except the two lolis drinking their glass of milk with bliss plastered on their faces, and the elderly grandma sitting at the counter, who is reading a small novel.

"Granny, thanks for taking care of my dirty laundry," I said, walking to the counter as I put some Eris on the table.

"Oh, no. It is my pleasure, young man. Are you finished with your hard work for today?"

"Yeah. It was a failure on our part, but it's a win regardless."

"I see, thank you very much for your hard work. Most adventurers here just slack off during nighttime."

She closed her book and sets it aside, her wrinkled fingers took the money that I put, and she inserted it on her cash box.

I just found out tonight that this public bath also accepts doing laundry, so might as well. I also tell the grandmother's granddaughter about how sensitive my jacket is to cleaning materials, I won't let anyone ruin my jacket again, after all.

"Alright, Megumin, Chris, we're leaving."

"Are you sure you are going to be fine with those shorts, Kouta?"

"Oh please, I didn't wear anything but shorts when I got locked inside a freeing room at one point."

"Are you even human?"

Chris laughed as she covered her mouth with her hand at our banter.

"Kouta-san and Megumin-san sure get along each other quickly. I like it when Kouta onii-san is like this."

I looked at the silver-haired girl with disbelief.

Kouta onii-san, huh?

Takes me back to the old times.

"Well, I excel in public relations, after all. Let's go, you two."

The three of us exited the public bath, and the evening wind slaps both of my legs with its coldness.

"Megumin, we'll go to the guild for now. If you want to you can lock the door before going to bed. You'll share the bed with Chris by the way, I can sleep on the long chair."

The little magician nodded, "Alright, I'll be goin- wait, how will you two get inside then?"

"Just don't let the keys hanging on the slot."

"Okay... Good night, you two."

As me and Chris saw Megumin walking to our inn, Chris looked at me with a confused look.

"Kouta-san, about that..."

"Oh don't worry, I brought everything from my jacket and jeans on my pants now, including the picklock I always used" Well I didn't bring everything back with me, just a lighter, the cigarettes and my picklock.

"Isn't lockpicking illegal?"

"If using magic to blow a door open is okay, then force opening it via a picklock should be legal as well. Come on."

As the both of us walked side by side, Chris suddenly pouts.

"What's with that face? It's new for me to see that from you."

"I mean, out of all the other people I sent to this world, Kouta-san is the only one that's too... too..."

"Let me guess, anti-heroic?"

"That's right! Kouta-san, you cheated against Kyoya-san, isn't that unfair?"

"I'm surprised you mentioned that first. I thought you're gonna scold me for using poison to kill monsters. But for starters, I'm a beginner and that bastard Mitsurugi is a veteran. He has his Cheat item, and I have none. Of course, you being on my side turned the tables completely. Is it unfair? Probably, but to defeat a cheater you must cheat as well, so in the end of the day everything is fair."

"Ah..."

"Look, in order for me to finish this whole RPG shenanigan and to bring you back to heaven, I don't mind dirtying my hand in order to win."

"Kouta-san, you don't have any wish of your own?"

Ah, crap, did I show it off too much?

I looked away, but her gaze is still aimed towards me, "Well, no. I pretty much thought I was going to hell when I die, so getting a chance to live a second life? That's a good wish, enough for me. Although, I'm trying to seek answers as well."

"Answers?"

"A little trivia, Chris. Do you know the weather that I dislike the most? It's on my facts section on your book, I believe."

Chris thought for a second before answering.

"...Winter?"

"Bingo. It marked the birth and death of the love of my life, and also marked the end of my career. It's also the time where everything becomes too festive for my own good, the price for the things I wanted skyrocketing and where some dumb idiots think Santa Claus is real. I truly hate winter season."

"...Winter of the year 2000, was it?"

"...yeah. I'm surprised you've read that far about me even though we've known each other for less than a week."

Yes, winter of the year 2000. That season marked the birth of my hatred towards winter.

It was a burden given by god himself, a sin that brought the unholy side of Minazaki Kouta.

"...but it was not entirely your fault, right?"

"Well yes, but actually no. I took all the blame. What could a thirteen-year-old do? Nothing, hence why I studied hard. But here I am."

"I see..."

Chris stopped asking questions as we continue our walk towards the guild.

The heavy atmosphere made me let out a sigh, and I start to talk.

"Look. Don't think too much about it, okay? In this world, I am no longer the Minazaki Kouta from my world. I am now simply a new adventurer from a faraway place."

"But still... are you really not going to defeat the Demon king for your wish?"

"No. in fact, I was going to give that benefit for you. You can have my wish. I can see how I abused your authority as a Goddess, so do take it as a win-win condition."

Just like how she stopped talking before, Chris stops walking. So, by the natural order of the cliché gods, I stopped walking as well.

"Then... I will do my best as a supporting role, _Kouta onii-san._ "

"...!"

The girl that's younger but also technically older in front of me, is the Goddess of luck and fortune, Eris.

And the man in front of her is a pathetic excuse of a NEET, Minazaki Kouta.

Seeing our differences, angels above would sing great praises about her, and the demons below would curse me with their degenerate mouths.

But this moment, this very moment, is truly a God's blessing upon this wonderful world.

* * *

 **YES, I AM FINALLY FREE!**

 **It has been a long time since the fourth chapter, I am sorry for that everyone. Sudden work and tasks are being thrown into my face yet again just right after I edited my profile (do check it to see my current status, by the way) so again, I am deeply sorry.**

 **But in this chapter, I think I set it up quite nicely, even though some things are pretttty rushed, I suppose my fingers are rusty now, but nothing is impossible if I practice again.**

 **And I finally decided to start things between Kouta and Chris, I swear this will be the death of me.**

 **Reviews would be appreciated, it's basically the only thing I eat on this site h-haha**

 **StarKnight07, signing out!**


	6. Chapter 6

In any RPG games, there is no such thing as a perfect guild. Perfect as in full of party members that actually care about their teamwork and party members that don't get into fights.

Yes, there is no such thing as a _normal_ guild. There are only guilds full of misbehaved party members that either kill their own comrades or silently take away all the guild funds all for themselves.

"...In conclusion, those who want a genuinely ideal guild, this world has no place for you."

"...Kouta Onii-san? What's with the monologue?"

"Did I say those weird lines out loud? Sorry, I'm not sure myself." I forgot she calls me by Kouta Onii-san now.

We have arrived at the guild and just like you might expect, everyone is drunk as always.

There are some people that sucked balls at playing cards and cried due to their bad luck, some others went their ways to woo the waitresses.

Well, I guess I can score a girl or two if you know what I mean, but that isn't what I came for.

As I take a sip from my glass, the beer slides down perfectly down my throat, Chris seems to look around at the hectic atmosphere.

"Say, Kouta Onii-san."

"Hmm? What is it, Chris?"

"Are the guilds in Japan like this as well?"

"There is no such thing as guilds in Japan. Other than internet cafes designed like one. But the closest thing would be pubs. You know, you might learn about some people called salarymen and sometimes they would go home tired because of demanding eyes from their peers and boss. So, what's the solution, you ask? Go to a pub, get drunk and let this beautiful thing wash away your depression and anxiety until you fell asleep before you went sober and cry yourself just to repeat the cycle of doom."

"Was that based on experience?"

"Silly you, your book didn't list me as a depressed salaryman does it?"

"I mean, you are on your third glass..."

"Ah, that's no big deal."

I stand up and bring my now emptied glass, "I'll talk to Luna-san first, you can order some food if you want."

"Yes!"

I put the empty glass I'm holding on one of the waitresses' serving tray, asking for a refill, before walking to Luna-san's counter.

"Yo, Luna-san."

"Good evening, Kouta-san. I see the quest went well? As expected of the most growing team of adventurers!"

"What does that mean? Us three barely did anything. Anyway, it was a bust."

I gave her my notes that I had written on the way to the guild, letting her examine it.

"This is... a detailed review of the quest?"

"Yeah. Sketched the things that I saw too. Goblins took the boars out. Way faster than I imagined. In my place goblins were supposed to be nocturnal, but if I guessed it right those abominations took out the boars between five in the afternoon to six in the evening. They seemed well-armed, albeit with badly designed weapons made out of a rock. Honestly, it might be my luck at work, but I don't like where this is going..."

Luna-san lets out a sigh as she puts my note aside, "I see... it is hard, the situation right now that is. There's been an uproar in the guild staff committee. It appears there's an awful looking castle being built not too far from this town. It could be..."

"...it could be one of the Generals."

"Yes, and the adventurers here are just beginners, so..."

"Oh, don't worry, there's probably a way to defeat one of them. Say, the bounty over the Generals' head must be big, huh?"

"Yes, defeating one of them will greatly help the kingdoms, after all."

I nodded, of course it would be big.

"But if the rumors were to be true, then I suppose it is logical. Low to middle leveled monsters are hiding, some of the adventurers noted." She added.

Luna-san's expression changed brightly as if she remembered something.

"Ah yes! Your subjugation rewards! Although the boars were taken out by the goblins, you did take care of them as well! 200.000 Eris for the goblins and 35.000 more for the detailed information." Luna-san said as she prepares a bag of coins.

"Oi, oi, isn't 35.000 for an information a little overboard?"

"But you even added important notes like this," she said, showing the page where I sketched one of the boars' corpse. It's one hell of a gore image you sketched there, me.

"I guess you're right. Thank you, Luna-san. Ah, by any case, any new possible members?"

"I don't think so... most turned their backs after knowing you teamed up with... Megumin-san..."

"So you knew, after all."

Not wanting to make her cry, I quickly forget ten ways to tease Luna-san as payback and go back to Chris instead.

"Chris, for the love of Minerva, what are you doing?"

In front of me is the same young girl that's actually the Goddess of Luck, sitting while drinking my glass of beer.

That's right, she's drunk at the moment.

"Wha-?! Ah, Kouta onii-*hiccup!*-san, welcome back~!"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm back. Say, why are you drinking my beer?"

Still letting out hiccups that sounded like a squeaking sound of a mouse, Chris rocked her head back and forth.

"I was *hiccup!* thirsty and I don't waaaaant to call a waitress for tea so I drank yours instead!"

I just realized this girl is troublesome too!

What is with this world?! I like it!

I laughed and clapped loudly, sitting in front of the drunk Goddess.

"Ah well, party away! Hey miss, one more glass for me!"

"And me too~!"

As the guild continues to be lively as usual, I watch in awe as the Goddess-in-incognito-more drinks more and more.

"Aaaah~~! This is the best! I haven't received this kind of sensation since ages ago!"

Her face is red and her eyes are going all over the place, chugging more and more than before.

'I guess I have a new drinking companion in this world as well.'

I light up my cigarette after ordering some food and more drinks for me and the drunk Chris.

"Say, Chris, party even harder okay?"

"You got it, Onyii-chan! Chris will *hiccup!* party hard!"

Her shout makes everyone cheer as all of them raised their own share of glasses high in the air.

We (read: Chris and co.) eat and eat, drink and drink some more until some adventurers dropped dead due to the many rounds of shots that they have drank.

Chris is so drunk; she begins to dance away with other adventurers.

Seriously, is she going to be okay?

And so, I found out that deep down her heart, Chris is still a youthful individual after all.

* * *

If you are standing outside the guild like I am now, you might see some amazing scene unfolding,

Namely, a Goddess puking out rainbows after drinking too much.

"Uuuuu... I... I feel like I violated myself and my own teachings... *Bleeeergh*... I can't be called a Goddess anymore..."

I silently patted Chris' back as she continues to puke out rainbows, it's funny how she goes drunk fast and becomes sober as fast as well.

"Now, now. It's okay to let out your party animal side once in a while, did you know one of the Greek gods, Zeus, fucks everyone and everything he sees worthy to be pierced by his thunder rod? Some Gods did more fucked up things than just being drunk."

Like, kicking away Lucifer for some reason or the other. Or the occasional backstabbing between Gods, what do I know?

"Was that supposed to cheer me up?! uuuuu... what would my followers do if they found out their Goddess went drunk so easily?"

"Wait, excuse me? Are you implying Gods in this world love to drink?"

"N-not that much, but Aqua-senpai..."

Ah, it's the deadbeat Goddess that sent that bastard Mitsurugi huh.

It is already four in the morning, and it's Sunday. Naturally, I would sleep peacefully before waking up in the afternoon to check out my mailbox, but that's not what I can do until I beat the Demon king.

"Say, Chris. In Axel town, there are churches, right?"

"Yes, one for Aqua-senpai and one for me. Ah, you can stop patting my back now. I'm fine."

I give her my handkerchief and let her wipe some of the snot from her nose.

"Today is Sunday, so why don't we check out your church?"

"Eh? But, wouldn't the priests-"

"You are not wearing your breast pads; you should be fine-!"

"GOD KICK!"

*BAM!*

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH MY GAO JEWELS! MY JYUOHKEN! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA THEY'RE BREAKING AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

Her fierce kick made me drop into the ground while holding tight of the weapon that would expand the Minazaki family that's located under my lower region.

Seriously, is she a Goddess?

"Hmph, that's your fault, Onii-san. Teasing a Goddess is a grave sin, you know?"

"Ah, it's numb. I can't feel them anymore. I can't even think of jacking off during the weekends now. I can't even procreate at this rate!"

"W-was my kick that hard? A-are you okay?!"

Tears still flowing from my eyes, I look up into the sky that slightly turns bright because of the rising sun, "Ah, yep. The nerves probably got ruined after that kick. Yeah. Won't be able to do anything with it now. I guess I'll just maintain some stable and be a farmer."

"KOUTA ONII-SAN I'M SORRY LET ME HEAL YOU!"

After taking a considerate amount of time to heal my holy sword, Chris and I decided to go to the inn.

I still need to take one step at a time slowly because my balls are still sore for a bad reason. Seriously, her kick is comparable to that of a horse.

I'm not a brony, by the way.

"Onii-san, is your... thing still hurt? I'm sorry..."

I weakly laughed, "No, it's fine... it's been a while since I felt that kind of pain" I am not a masochist.

I turned the doorknob, and the door opened.

"Ah, Kouta, Chris. Welcome back."

Here we see our little Archwizard loli friend, eating breakfast all alone.

Wait.

"Oi, that Elf lady on the first floor never told me about room service. What is this?"

As she keeps on munching frog legs that are coated in garlic sauce, she started to speak.

"Well, I just went out and asked her for breakfast. She'll put it under your tab by the way. Ah, I bought you two breakfast as well."

Well, might as well.

As we joined Megumin by sitting down on the carpeted floor, I began to talk while grabbing a piece of frog leg. Mine's deep-fried so it shouldn't be that bad.

"Say, do you know about the rumors that have been circling around? Itadakimasu." I began the conversation, and take a bite off the leg. Chewy, and surprisingly juicy too.

"Rumors? I-itadakimasu." Chris answered, eating her own share.

"*munch* yeah, about the uh... what do you call one again? Generals of the Demon King?"

"Ah, I don't think so. Most of the time I just hang out at the guild trying to ask people to invite me." The wizard answered.

Wait a minute, that's pretty sad! Thank god she stayed with us now.

I still don't like her chuuni vibes, however.

"The Demon King's underlings, huh? We should be ready, then" Chris commented.

"Yeah, and knowing the guild won't have any low or middle-ranked monsters to be killed because of one General makes it hard. Let's try our best tomorrow to scout some party members. A team that consisted of one supporter and two attackers that can't do much because of limited mana or a one-shot ticket won't do much on harder quests. I'd say... how about we try scouting someone with defense-related class? Like a Knight, for example," I proposed.

And by the way, this frog is actually tasty. My friend back in Japan was right, after all!

"A Knight... Ah! Kouta Onii-san! Let us go to the Eris church now!"

I took a sip from my cup of coffee, "You seem excited. I mean sure, but I need to wash my face first. Ah, and I guess I can buy some new clothes, I don't want to damage my jacket and jeans any further."

"Actually, I believe there is a knight that loved to visit the church..."

"?" I look at her smiling face in confusion, "Well, let me wash my face first. Ah, Megumin, can you check out the guild for some quests? Don't bring me some dumb subjugation quests though."

"You got it, but let's finish this breakfast first."

Chris and I only looked at Megumin as she wolfed down her share of food.

"Haha, I guess she's right. Gotta build some energy."

"Yes!"

After finishing my breakfast, I went to the bathroom first.

Chris and Megumin are talking about something that I don't clearly understand so I'll let them be.

I look at the reflection in the mirror.

"Hmm... I really should get a haircut, but I don't know if barbers are a thing in this kind of age."

I combed my hair down with my hand, "huh, some of them still have that hair dye that I used back then."

It's kind of dumb seeing the few strands of red hair when the majority of my hair is black.

Deciding to not think about it anymore, I quickly wash my face with the flowing tap water.

"Alright, even if the Goddess is beside me, I had to clean my face when visiting her main domain at the very least."

I left the bathroom after looking at the mirror one more time.

"Alright, are we ready to go?"

"Yes!" / "Yeah. I'll find ourselves a good quest." Replied the both of them.

As I look upon their smiling faces, something crossed my mind.

Will the author really be fine with all these line breaks?

* * *

"Well, it appears the author will be fine after all. And now we're walking towards the church."

"The author?"

"Forgive my tendency to break the fourth wall, dear sis of mine."

As I was saying, the two of us are currently walking towards the church dedicated to the Goddess of Luck, Eris.

I found out just now that there are two main religions in this world. Namely, the Eris Cult, a cult –as the name suggests—that dedicated their life to Eris. And there's the Axis Cult, a group of people that dedicated their life to Aqua, the Goddess of Water.

I need to find out more about these cultists, they seem fun. Especially the Axis guys, they seem to be the party animal kind of people, which I really like.

"Say, Chris. What happens when someone that doesn't believe in both of these religions enters one of their churches?"

"Are you saying you don't believe in me?"

"Well no, I just don't like wasting my life dedicating myself to some omnipotent beings high above the skies and whatnot. My life is short enough as it is, so I'd rather do something meaningful towards the world in a whole sense of things."

Chris ponders a bit, "well, I don't think my people would mind. Aqua-senpai's followers, however..."

She shivers a bit before looking away, "They tend to get... carried away..."

Ah. Another group of nutjobs then.

"Well, even I know some priests are dirty little boys deep in their hearts. And considering you are walking slower than before I assume we have reached our destination?"

"Well, it's five minutes more of walking." Chris laughed.

Just like what she said earlier, we arrived at the Eris church five minutes after.

The building is elegant, and the colors matched with Chris' attire.

Deep blue, so deep like the vast ocean. Light blue on some areas just like the beautiful sky that protects all of us from the sun's UV rays. And of course, the white, red and golden strokes of colors that beautifully blends in.

"I kinda like this church, respect to the one that made it for you."

"Thank you, Kouta Onii-san. Well, let's go!"

"Well, after you."

She opened the two huge doors that have, what it appears to be, the logo of the Eris Cult carved on it.

"Wow. This is on par with the Notre Dame." I whistled in amusement.

"Welcome, guided ones, to the Church of Eris. I am the priest in charge of Axel Town's church, call me Helel." A man in his thirties said as he welcomed me and Chris.

But seriously? Helel?

"Let me guess. Helel Ben Shahar? The Morningstar? The One Basked in Divine Light?"

Seriously even I can't stand with all these religious names being thrown all over the place. I'm starting to feel this Fantasy World is made by some crackhead from Los Angeles. Or it could be Las Vegas.

Chris looks at me with a confused expression written all over her face, "Kouta Onii-san?"

"Ah, sorry. Helel, my name is Kouta. Minazaki Kouta. And this is my younger sister, Chris."

"...I see. Welcome, Kouta-san, and Chris-san... have I seen you somewhere?"

Ah crap, here it goes.

Some of them say that a priest that dedicated most of his life would be able to recognize his Lord easily, whether that Lord has a penis or not. And this man right here looks religious enough to make me stop my brain from making filthy lies to evade this sticky situation.

Chris averts her gaze so that hers can't meet Helel's experienced eyes, "N-no, I don't think so. My brother and I just arrived at this town days ago, so..."

Helel only stared at her and laughed afterward.

"I see, pardon me for my doings. It appears I had a false assumption. Now, what brings you two here today? Confessing your sins, perhaps?"

"Hey, I-"

As I start to retort, Helel looked at me with a simple smile. I feel like this man is dangerous, what's with dangerous priests? There are those that would molest a child and now this guy is looking through my brain or something? I mean I have some sins, but...

"We're looking for someone." Chris says, lightly tapping my arm as if to say 'Leave this to me'.

"Ah, do tell me the one you have in mind, Chris-san."

"I believe... there's a Crusader that faithfully prays to the Goddess Eris every Sunday."

Wait, where did she- oh right, because she's the actual Eris, surprise, surprise.

"Ah yes. Darkness-san is her name. She should be here anytime soon. She never comes too early nor too late I believe."

Darkness sounds like a name for someone that doesn't believe in the good side of the world. Or this girly Crusader is some twisted young maiden that's into emo names.

Oh and by the way, if by some weird twist of fate, her attacks miraculously don't hit her opponents all the time it would fit well with the Final Fantasy's Blind that can also be referred to as Darkness. You know, when your character can't hit despite the fact that they have the most overpowered gear and whatnot? Yeah, you guessed it.

God, please don't count this as me raising a negative Flag.

As the three of us are standing in the center of the church, the doors opened with quiet sound, and a sound of footsteps follows, making me and Chris look towards the source of said footsteps.

There she walks, a tall, beautiful woman aged between 17 to 20, with her long blonde hair kept in a ponytail, tied with a braid. Her red clips, secured on both sides of her bangs. Her clear blue eyes showing her excellence as a knight. Donning an armor, clad in a wonderful mix of yellow, white and black colors. On her left shoulder is a metal shoulder pad, and a cloth designed to look like that of a wing is perch on her right. And last but not least, a shining yellow gem on her chest area with a red ribbon as the finishing touch.

"Welcome, Darkness-san. Came for the usual?"

"Yes. Thank you."

Helel and the woman dubbed Darkness changed lines as she walks past us.

There, she solemnly bows in front of what appears to be a statue made for the Goddess beside me.

Wait a minute.

"Psst, your statue has quite the chest. Can I admire your statue's beauty up close?"

"Mou, again with my chest..."

Helel sighed as he sees me and Chris whispering to each other.

"So, Kouta-san. I assume you two wants to meet Darkness-san?"

"Yes, actually. See, my party is in dire need of a member with knight-like qualities, and my sister over here proposes that the two of us should come here. Apparently, my sister was right, as always."

"Brilliant. Darkness-san is a devoted follower of Eris-sama,"

"I can tell."

"and she's been praying to her weekly for a simple wish."

I look over at Chris, but her face signals that she doesn't know, or simply didn't remember.

Helel continued, "Her wish was to have a friend. She had a rough childhood, or so I heard."

Ah, this kind of trope.

Seriously, is my party going to be that one team with a bunch of characters with clashing tropes?

But considering I already have two lolis in my party...

"OUCH!"

As if able to read these thoughts of mine, Chris stomped my foot with her heels.

"Bloody hell, woman!"

"Kouta-san, words such as those are not fit to be said inside Eris-sama's church."

Well, excuse me.

I decided to walk around inside the church. I'm not a big fan when it comes to Sunday prayers but churches have always sparked this fiery soul of a designer within me.

Even I can tell the materials for everything that I see here are top quality, the best around I dare say.

"Say, Helel. How many followers of Eris are there? In Axel, I mean." I decided to start another conversation.

"Around a thousand or more, I assume. I can tell because I'm the archpriest around here."

"Hmm."

"Helel-san, does the Eris cultists and the Axis cultists... you know. Do they go along fine?" Chris asks.

What makes the two of us surprised is that Helel scoffed, quite rude for a priest, no?

"Those Axis followers. I can't say anything other than I hate them for being such a group of uneducated miscreants. Faithfully following their Goddess' teachings is fine, but I wouldn't walk alongside fanatics, nay, extremists."

"Woah, are we talking about like, ISIS level of extreme or?"

"Kouta Onii-san!"

"Well, sorry."

Helel clears his throat before continuing, "But we Eris Cultists keeps our relationship nicely with the Axis fellows."

Listening to Helel's words, Chris nods happily, "That's right! Even though they're very obnoxious in some cases we must maintain a perfectly healthy relationship with the Axis people."

Wow, this is the first time I heard her talking like that. Is that some egotistical note coming from her lips?

"—and please guide me until the very last breath that I take. I shall come next Sunday, Eris-sama." Darkness said, standing up and walking towards up with a noble aura coming out of her.

Huh, she does look like a reliable knight.

"Darkness-san. This is Kouta-san and Chris-san, they have been waiting to meet you." Helel said, introducing me and Chris.

"Wonderful. It is a pleasure to meet you two. I am Darkness, an adventurer with the calling of Crusader. My family has been this kingdom's sword and shield since day one, and I intend to keep up with the tradition."

"That's oddly specific, but my name is Minazaki Kouta, and this is my little sister, Chris. See, we got this kind of—"

"Yes, your conversation was quite loud, probably because of the vacancy of the church at the moment. And Helel, I didn't think you would tell my wish that way."

Helel wants to say something but Darkness looks at me and Chris with... heavy breaths?

"T-t-to think someone would know my prayers to Eris-sama from the priest and not from myself... *huff* *huff* and f-f-for such a knight to have a wish so small...!"

She ends the line with a loud shriek of... ecstasy? Wait, what am I seeing right here?

When I look at Helel, he looked away faster than my mother driving away from Mickey D's when I asked her that I want a happy meal. Wait a minute. That reaction is unfitting for a priest!

Oh no, no, no.

I then look at Darkness, still breathing heavily with shivers running down her spine and all.

"...Alright. Say, would you like to join my party?"

"Yes! It's like hitting one bird with two stones!"

"You need to step up your word games, dear sister because you kinda put the numbers in the wrong order."

Stopping her suspicious body movements, Darkness laughed seeing my bickering with Chris and nodded.

"I believe... this is also what Eris-sama really wanted."

Oh, come now, don't give me all that faith bullshit.

Darkness raises her right hand with a genuine smile on her face, and I accept her hand with my own.

"I promise I shall be a reliable party member."

"I heard your word."

But she doesn't let go.

"Um, Darkness?"

"In fact, if you ever feel disappointed just throw me a-a-at some hole full of alligators, o-o-or lock me up in a cursed dungeon full of monsters!"

"I get it already, let go of me, dammit!"

...

"Ouch, that woman actually has some deadly grip." I cursed; my right hand Is bloody numb now.

"Um, Kouta Onii-san? Are you okay?"

"Oh, I'm fine. Say, why don't you go to the guild with Darkness first. I've got something to talk to with Helel."

"Your sins aren't that bad though?"

"It's not about- please? For your onii-san."

Thinking for a moment, Chris nods.

"Okay. But..."

"I know what you're thinking. And you can count on me that I will always count on you. But I need some indirect guidance first."

Chris doesn't reply to my reasoning and goes off to talk to Darkness, telling her that I will stay back for a while. Darkness takes a glance at me, which I responded with a nod. She nods back and left with Chris beside her.

"So, what do you want to talk about, Kouta-san?"

I turn around, walking towards him.

"Yeah, you see... about the whole me thing. I was—"

"You were reincarnated from another world when you died."

"—yes, and I kinda—"

"Broke the rules by pulling Eris-sama into this world from her safe haven, which is heaven."

"Wow, you're good" a cookie for this guy.

"Look, what you did is a grave sin, Kouta-san. Bringing a Goddess into the world of mortals won't do any good."

"Well, what can I say, I was too caught up with the whole process of me being killed by my own purchases."

Helel sighs, "I won't be mad at you for bringing my Goddess. But please, at least atone for this grave sin of yours by defeating the Demon king. For her sake and this world."

I can't reply back to the man's plea. Sure, I know it was a dick move to drag Chris down with me, but...

I let out a weak laugh, "I'm a bad brother."

"You are, but you can fix the things you ruined. Starting by defeating one of the Generals."

Wait, what?

"One of the Generals?"

The priest nodded, "Yes. There is a suspicious-looking castle being built not too far from this town. It might be one of the Generals."

Hmm, what Helel said matches with what Luna-san told me last night.

"I'll give it a shot. And are you really... you know?"

Helel nods, "Yes. I am one of the angels under Eris-sama's command. Although, my brothers call me Lucifer."

"I see. I'll keep this a secret from Chris then. I mean, that's if the form I'm looking at the moment is merely a disguise" so that's why there's a giant hole on his back. I mean I'm fine with people wearing clothes without protecting their backs, its quite the sight, actually.

"Yes, this is merely a disguise to blend in. But one more thing."

He looks at my right leg, where my dagger is being stored in its case.

"Why do you have a Divine Relic on your hands when you chose Eris-sama back then?"

"I found it under my bed at the inn I'm currently staying. Something's wrong?"

"You don't know its true name, no?"

"What? Is this dagger a Servant or something? Pretty sure Servants takes the form of human beings, safe for Hessian Lobo and that one Hassan."

"I don't get the reference but Divine Relics, when not on their original wielder's hands, will be regular items. But that dagger of yours, it wields tremendous power, even stronger than what it looks like."

"But Chris didn't know about this dagger."

"Perhaps that weapon came from..."

I groan as I facepalmed, "the so-called deadbeat Goddess of Water."

"Precisely. But I wouldn't be too worried. You were brought here by the better Goddess."

"Wow, the better Goddess, that's a new insult line in my book."

Today I learned: even angels tend to shit on their Goddesses.

Helel chuckles, "well, even I have limited patience."

I scoffed at his response, "I mean, yeah. With your lore being the bloody fallen angel and all. I actually like you now. We probably have more in common."

"Yes, maybe you are right. Now, Kouta-san. You know what to do."

"Oh, that I know. I need to buy new clothes, for Christ's sake. See you around, Lightbringer."

"Wait, what—"

Leaving the dumbstruck angel behind, I leave the church with a far more open mind.

I guess visiting the church is a good thing, after all.

...

I am currently in a clothing store.

"Well, these aren't half bad."

I whistled happily as I pose in front of the mirror.

I decided to get myself a large, navy blue jacket/cloak with its sleeves long on the right hand and short on the left. It has two pockets on its left and right side, giving me some callback to my favorite jacket.

I am also wearing a black vest that you would normally wear to attend important meetings or parties underneath said jacket/cloth mix. A black and white necktie that I wear is loosely hanging simply because I find neckties as my mortal enemy (but still a good addition nonetheless), and as a finishing touch, a pair of black jeans with white stripes running on both sides.

"How do you like them, esteemed customer?"

"They're great, actually. Reminded me of my favorite alter ego."

"Alter ego?"

"Anyway, how much was it again?"

Paying the cost, I left the store and walk towards the guild.

...

As I arrived at the guild, everyone looked at me and my new attire, it's always good to be some black diamond in the house.

"Ah, you three are here as I expected."

Chris, Megumin, and the newly added to the party Darkness looks at me as I called them.

"Wow, look who's ready to crash in some noble's party," Megumin said, looking at my head to toe.

"Those look good on you, Kouta Onii-san. What's with the loose tie, though?"

"I can't tie my tie. I've been trying for twelve years, never goes well" I almost killed myself in front of my classmates once.

"Well anyway, I found something. Here you go"

I take the quest paper from Megumin and look at it.

"It says 'our teacher is sick so our music choir can't do practice for the Harvest festival soon. Looking for someone that can teach kids around 14 to 15 years old music for a week'. Megumin we're here to kill monsters and do some cool stuff, not sitting in a circle with kids all around us."

Darkness comments, "As much as I want to get beat- I mean, as much as I want to subjugate strong monsters, there are only monsters that are strong enough to be a hassle."

"Hold on, are you gonna say you want monsters to beat you up?"

"Nothing of the sort."

Is this girl secretly a masochist?!

Chris claps her hand happily, "Well, why don't we take it? I'm sure it will be fun! And those kids are training hard for the harvest celebration, we should help them!"

Hmm...

"What's the harvest about?"

"It's... better if you find out later, Kouta" Darkness replied.

I sighed, "Well, I guess let's be a teacher for one day. Thank god I got three degrees in front of my name that puts professors to shame."

"Which turns out to be fake, right?"

Megumin and Darkness blankly stares at me, "Jiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii..."

"I-I did it for professional work, okay?! But, let's go teach them how to be Mozart-tier musicians!"

As the three ladies before me cheered, I start to think.

Is the author gonna do a time skip again?

* * *

"Bloody hell, how many times have we skipped time? We're not Diavolo and King Crimson."

"You sure love saying weird lines, Kouta Onii-san. But we are here."

Lux Ante school, weird choice for a name.

"Right, let's go then."

The school, as much to my surprise, looks like any junior high school you would find in Japan. What do you mean this town is based on the medieval ages?

Megumin smiles as we look around the building, "It's been a while since I visit a school like this. My magic school back in my village is ten times cooler though."

"I can imagine that; I've been wanting to study in some magic school. My choice back then was either Hogwarts or Mysteria."

"Weird names."

Like you're one to talk.

I wanted to say that in a straight-man manner but I feel like she'll pounce on me and will choke me to death.

Darkness sighs, "I wish I enrolled in a public school. My father didn't let me, and I was tutored by a private teacher of my family."

"My condolences."

As we talk among each other, a girl around 15 to 16 years old came towards us.

"Um, are you the ones that accepted our request?"

I nod, showing her the quest paper, "Yes, I believe so. Minazaki Kouta. The girls behind me are Chris, Megumin, and Darkness."

"I see! Thank you for accepting our request! As the paper suggests, our teacher, Ellen-sensei couldn't come because she got a sudden illness, so it would be great if you could be her replacement!"

"Of course. And you are...?"

"Oh, right! I'm Lopez, nice meeting you!"

Before I can say "likewise", Lopez hugged me tightly.

"Hnng—!" god what's with little girls and their brute force here?!

And what's worse, I can totally sense Chris' intense stare aimed at my back!

"Oh, I'm sorry! It's kinda my thing, well my family's way to greet a new person! And I've never seen your face in this town, so..."

"I- *haa* I get it, so let's meet the kids."

"Gladly!"

She leads us to the second floor, a large door with a sign that reads "Music club" could be seen.

She opens the sliding door and with a smile, she says: "Welcome to the club!"

"Oh, my God" I can't believe this.

A piano that's oh so elegant is placed on the center of the room. Its color reminded me of the piano that I always played with one the pub that I always visited with my friends in Japan. Guitars, both acoustic and electric are placed on the walls, all of them shining in all their glory. Violins can be seen hanging on the walls as well, some rival the Bloody Rose my friend Otoya always bragged about in terms of quality. Other musical instruments like clarinets, drums and many more are present as well.

"Lopez? Is this the ones that replace Ellen-sensei?"

One of the kids asks Lopez, there are around seventeen of them, so eighteen if I count Lopez in as well.

"Yep! These Onii-chans will help us practice for the harvest festival!"

The kids cheer, well they are also around Lopez's age so there's that.

"Say, am I really the only one in the room to not know about this harvest festival or whatever?"

Megumin and Darkness hold their laugh as I put a confused face. Damn them! I should kick them into a room full of rats later.

"Kouta-san, the harvest festival is actually three weeks from now, but we are preparing for the cabbage hunt!"

...Cabbage hunt?

"What, they don't want to be harvested by you know, us plucking them off the ground?"

"Uh, no. They'll fly away to a desolate place once they are ready to be harvested, they don't want to be food for humans so they chose to die the hard way."

That's ridiculous!

Lopez continues her explanation, "I know, I know. But it's fun and mildly dangerous, so the adventurers here are always ready to fight them. That includes you guys as well."

I look at Chris, signaling if she knew about all of this.

The girl only replied with a slight smile.

I feel like I'm getting played around.

"...Well never mind that, then. So, these are all the members, including you?"

Lopez nodded, "Yeah. We sometimes do charity performances as well for orphanages, and we do some performance tour kind of deal by playing music while walking around the town. It's pretty fun. I'll be graduating next year so I really hoped we can pull this year's celebration beautifully."

"Well, I guess we can't do this half-willingly, right? Kouta Onii-san?"

"I don't like your tone, Chris, but you are right. Well! Can anyone tell me how you all do things here?"

The four of us, along with Lopez and the other students are currently sitting on the clean floor, forming a circle. Just like what I expected.

They all told us about various things, from how this Ellen person would introduce them to new songs and new arrangements of beautiful symphonies, and the history of the choir band club.

They mentioned someone with black hair and black eyes taught Ellen about instruments that no one has never seen before, before departing to the Belzerg kingdom to join the military force to defeat the Demon King's forces.

So, these instruments were brought by a reincarnated Japanese like me as well, huh?

"Did Ellen-sensei give any of you a new arrangement or maybe some new music?"

They all shook their heads, signaling a no.

"This is really troubling us, ya know? Ellen-sensei is a great teach, I mean... we were a bunch of dorks that couldn't even remember how to tune our guitars properly. But she... she helped us, gave us meaning to continue going to school."

Oh god, why does every musical club I meet have to involve delinquents?

"...Ryou's right. Ellen-sensei is like our own mother, and it's heartbreaking to hear she suddenly got an illness and went sick."

Oh great now they are all mumbling about how they missed her. It's not like she's dead already.

But I can relate about how sad it is to not see someone that's always supporting your back due to unknown reasons. Scratch that, they left me because of something that I did, but that's not important right now.

"Well, why don't you guys show how things are done here? Before teaching you guys, we need to see how you all play, then we can guide you on how to fix mistakes" it's time to take things into a spin.

"That's true, Kouta-san and the rest can't teach us without a test performance first!"

One of the kids raised her hand and asks, "Umm... Kouta-san? Are you good in any kinds of musical instruments?"

"Good question. I am quite skilled at everything, if anything I'm good when it comes to playing instruments but my skills aren't that perfect, either. A jack of all trades. But I play the piano, guitar, and violin the most."

Another raises his hand and asks, "Are you good at singing as well?"

"Not when I'm drunk."

The questions keep on coming and coming.

"Can you play the drums? How about the clarinet?"

"Can you reach the highest octave known to mankind?"

"Do you know how to play twinkle twinkle, little star on the violin?"

Seeing how I'm quite overwhelmed with the questions, Lopez cuts in.

"N-now, now... why don't we ask Chris nee-chan and the rest now?"

Before the kids can shower them with questions, Megumin stands up.

"MY NAME IS MEGUMIN! THE PROUD ARCHWIZARD, AND THE PROUD CRIMSON DEMON! AND I... can not... play musical instruments that well..."

"Oi."

She averts her gaze as I coldly stare at her.

...

"I-I can only play the violin... but I always broke them..."

"Oi."

Just like Megumin, Darkness looks away, blushing heavily.

"W-what about Chris nee-chan?"

Come on, Eris! Don't make the kids look at you the same way they stared at Megumin and Darkness!

"W-well... I think I can sing a bit..."

"Like brother, like sister, huh..."

"Oi. What do you mean by that? And what's with that relieved expression? You thought my sis over here can't do anything like you, huh?"

"What's that?! I'll beat you, punk!"

"Come at me, then! Pounce on me you lol—!"

Megumin shrieks like a little kitten before pouncing at me, tackling me down onto the floor as I struggle to push her away.

"Take that back! Take my status as a loli back to that mouth of yours!"

"Never! You're just a loli—AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA OKAY, OKAY, I SURRENDER DON'T SNAP MY NECK AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

...

After successfully escaping the death bringer dubbed Megumin, I am now sitting on a wooden chair with my legs crossed, tuning an acoustic guitar.

"This fellow is well-maintained, I like it."

With my fingers, I pick the strings, letting them sing out a beautiful melody.

It's around two in the afternoon, and we decided to do our own things from this point on.

Megumin is learning how to play bass with some students, while Chris and Darkness try to write some songs together with Lopez.

The other kids are doing their daily routine, namely tuning their instruments or playing with them.

From the looks of it... They're doing a pretty good job even without us.

"...Fantastic Dreamers, huh?"

Nodding to myself, I decided to play the song _she_ always listened to.

A song that reminded me how stupid God is.

* * *

 **Ah, how long has it been, I wonder?**

 **Hello everyone, SK07 here. I don't have any excuses that I can use to explain the reason why this chapter came out... later than I expected. Real-life problems have decided to drag me down again and honestly? I was on my breaking point. Of course, no one knows about this lol. I've been doing great over these past few months, and I think it is about time to update this fic again. I appreciate the reviews, and I see there are some new followers! Thanks, everyone! Let us look forward to the future together!**


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